BRAND NEW ON E!
Happy National Mean Girls Day, bitches! If you don't know why you're celebrating the Lindsay Lohan hit today then, after we write some nasty things about you in our Burn Book (obviously), we'll be happy to fill you in:
"On October 3rd, he asked me what day it was," Cady Heron's voiceover reveals about her blossoming romance with Aaron Samuels (Jonathan Bennett). To which she joyfully responds, "It's October 3rd."
AKA today, AKA #NationalMeanGirlsDay as far as the Twitter legions are concerned. And who are we to turn down a party? It's not like we're grounded. And while we're leaving our slutty animal ears for later in the month, there's another uniform requirement today:
Uh, duh! It's Wednesday and on Wednesdays we wear pink. As the always helpful Queen Bee, Regina George (Rachel McAdams), was kind enough to point out, "This won't happen for another 6 years... WEAR PINK OR DIE."
Or you can't sit with us. Which might be worse. But anyway, make sure you celebrate today: Maybe eat some cheese fries for lunch (you so don't need to lose three pounds), hit up a happy hour (from four to six, though if you're going to drink we'd rather you do it in the house) and throw a super fetch party.
Just make sure you invite us, because we like invented you. Know what we mean?
What to avoid on this most sacred of holidays? Well, probably any of the current Lindsay's grotsky party habits (it's so not grool to have any police run-ins today), crack and remember: don't have sex. Because you will get pregnant and die.
Otherwise, live it up, Plastics! Maybe even take a tip from Kanye West, who's most definitely celebrating National Mean Girls Day today. But we'll let him explain: "We were on the jet flyin' back to New York, partyin'. We were watchin' Mean Girls. And that's how we party."
And remember (this goes double for you, 'Ye): Don't be sorry that people are so jealous of you. You can't help it that you're so popular.