Fame PicturesDear Ted:
I've been reading your column forever...even when there weren't that many celeb gossip blogs, and you are still the best! The Twilight saga is a guilty pleasure, and I was wondering what you think of Johnny Depp as one of the Romanians in Breaking Dawn? I know it's a stretch but his daughter apparently loves the series, and he might be one of the few actors who could do a Transylvanian accent without looking like a tool.
—Adriana, Toronto
Dear Too Hot To Think About:
Johnny trading in his pirate costume? Sounds oddly possible. But would a serious actor like Depp want to keep doing "kid" movies? Not that us adults aren't mouthwatering like nuts over them. So, maybe he could?
Dear Ted:
Why, why, why Ted? You've really got the Twihards panties in a twist over the latest Robsten news. Those two were absolutely getting bombarded with fangirls and paps who then had the audacity to follow the couple into their hotel lobby. And it sounded to me like Robert Pattinson was apologizing to a fangirl, not Kristen Stewart. Play nice! We Robsten fans can be very delicate creatures ya know. Plus, I only want to see a good public fight if it's followed by a steamy PDA!
—Bubble
Dear No Fun:
We said they weren't fighting in public! Sure, if you want to watch it a billion times, he could be talking to a fangirl, or he could be talking to Kristen. Who really knows? Point is no one should read into it, Robsten is fine. For now, at least.
Dear Ted:
Who do you think wears the pants in the Robsten relationship?
—Erin
Dear Stretch Jeans:
I think it goes back and forth. Kristen did for a while, though.
Dear Ted:
Oh puhleez! The women who slept with Dave Letterman are not victims. His wife is the only victim here. They knew he was involved and chose to sleep with him anyway. Any woman who willingly sleeps with a boss to either save or advance her career is accountable for her own actions. Dignity and self-respect should not have a price. Did he abuse his position of power? Yes, but only because they let him. Oh and to compare this to celebs defending Roman Polanski is a bit of a stretch. Dave is a douchebag husband. Polanski is a criminal.
—Sandra
Dear Womanizer:
Sorry, a womanizing culture helps breed worse crimes like rape. I'm surprised, as a woman, you aren't more sensitive to that.
Dear Ted:
The latest two Hollywood news stories make me think Hollywood really is far removed from the real world. First Polanski and now Letterman. Last time I checked, it wasn't the best idea to sleep with your employees. Is Hollywood the only place in America where, if affairs are discovered, the boss gets to keep his job? Why are celebrities sticking up for Letterman? How can the Hollywood types criticize the scuzzy things Bill O'Reilly did but not criticize Letterman? Seems to me the Letterman thing has all kinds of legal implications beyond the extortion case.
—Confused
Dear Not So Real World:
Honey, surely this can't be the first indicator that things are totally effed in this town. How about all the celebs who get busted for drugs and DUIs and never see the inside of a prison cell? Paris Hilton excluded, of course.
Dear Ted:
Rob Pattinson was caught being a gentleman. I was watching E! News and they said he used his body to block the paparazzi from taking pictures of Kristen Stewart. Aren't you so proud?
—Supergirl
Dear 'Bout Time:
You mean People (who note Kristen as Rob's girlfriend in his bio, FYI for all of you believe this mag to be the Holy Grail) reported that. It's about time Rob got a wee-bit of manners! Almost makes us forget he hasn't been opening doors for his babe.
Dear Ted:
Any hints you can give on Brad Pitt's B.V.? Do he and Angie share one or are they separate? Kisses!
—Jenn
Dear Bad Brange:
Do you mean in life or in our Vices? They have separate B.V.s, if that's what you mean. But they share just about everything else.
Dear Ted:
You go to the premiere of Law Abiding Citizen and don't talk to Gerard Butler at all? I mean, I know he isn't your fave guy, but some of us happen to like us some Scotch on the rocks.
—Agusta
Dear Too Stiff:
Haven't you heard—Gerard is a big ole movie star now, he doesn't have time for most press.
Dear Ted:
Are you joking? Team Edward. Never would we change.
—Amj
Dear Cullen Cheer Squad:
You sure? Some would probably jump ship. I mean, we love Ed Cullen here, but man, look at Jacobs hard-rock abs...so effing hot! Where are Rob's?
Dear Ted:
Thanks so much for speaking your mind regarding the horrible Roman Polanski and David Letterman. You are one of the few in the media I have read who called Dave out for his treatment of women. Thank you, it's nice to know there is someone out there in L.A. who hasn't given up believing in basic human decency; someone who is outraged when that is violated.
—Sunshine
Dear Open Mind:
Much thanks, sweetheart!
Dear Ted:
What don't you like about Chace Crawford?
—Supergirl
Dear Stalk-ford:
I'm not legally allowed to say.
Dear Ted:
Is there any drama happening at Dancing With the Stars with both Willa Ford & Nick Carter being in the audience—along with the fact that the partners of those they are there to cheer on are on opposing sides as well (Maks & Karina)? And Willa's rumored involvement with both Max & Chuck Liddell—besides being Nick Carter's ex?
—Betty
Dear Dancing for Drama:
Are you kidding, so much goes down behind the scenes on that show! For more, head on over to Marc Malkin for DWTS dish, he's always there.
Dear Ted:
What would you think of Rob Pattinson playing Elvis?
—Nanajudy
Dear Hairy Comparison:
Please, you all think Rob's too shy to do SNL, but he would dance his ass off as the original King? Sorry, but can't see Rob shaking those hips on screen. Zac Efron, maybe.
Dear Ted:
There is a rumor on one of the big blogs that Pitt and Jolie are getting married. In your opinion is the rumor fact, fiction or maybe? Now if you say fact or maybe, please explain how all her many problems got resolved since your Oct. 1 Bitch-Back!
—Whatsnew
Dear Mr. and Mrs. Pitt:
I'm gonna go with fiction on that one.
Dear Ted:
What the hell is going on with Lindsay LoLhan, and yes I put that L there on purpose. Her "fashion" show was a complete failure accompanied by negative reviews. Her movies, or shall I say movie, went straight to a TV premiere. And what is up with her appearance these days? Her overplumped lips, frail hair, messy relationship and questionable choice of clothes are not benefiting her whatsoever. Now it seems she's corrupting her little sister, bringing her along to parties and for heaven's sake the girl is only 15! She had a promising career after starring in Freaky Friday and Mean Girls but after that she fell down from the top. Nowadays her actions are questionable. What happened to the healthy, cheery redhead? Did it all end when the crotch shot came in or did it happen way before that?
—Faye
Dear Missing Good Ol' Lohan:
Nowadays? Honey, she's been tumbling down a steep slope for a while. She has to accept the fact that she needs help and we're here for her...even if it means outing her s--t.
Dear Ted:
Holy crapola, have you seen Papa Cullen's arms? And who do you think would win in a catfight, Kristen Stewart or Megan Fox?
—Supergirl
Dear Hot for Papa Cullen:
Yeah, I guess those are some pretty nice guns for Peter Facinelli...I say we see a better pic with his shirt off! And as for Stewart vs. Fox? Who knows, they're both feisty little bitches...it can go either way, but I'd say K.Stew.
Dear Ted:
Love you tons, do you ever blind date? I have a fine son who would rock your world! He is self-sufficient, very handsome, published (print and music), a classical violinist and very available!
—A Happy Mamma
Dear Pimping Mama:
Haven't done too well picking for myself, that's for sure, so, yeah, send him on over!