Frazer Harrison/Getty ImagesDear Ted:
Am I the only one creeped out by photos (clearly arranged, because how many paps hang out in the remote corners of southern Italy?) of Jake and Reese engaging in a PDA while Jake's mother and a personal assistant look on approvingly? What is up with that?
—A concerned Texan
Dear Creepy Couple:
Maybe the fam is just happy Jake found such a sweet gal like Reese! Plus, wherever Gyllenspoon goes, paps follow, whether they're invited or not. (We bet Maggie and Peter sure didn't want 'em around on their wedding day.)
Dear Ted:
I must be missing something here. Why would Summit be so opposed to a Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart romance? Most of the fans would love it, so if anything, I'd believe Summit would encourage the rumors. Do they think that if the dating relationship goes kaput, the chemistry up there on the screen will, too? P.S. I like "Krisbert" better than "Robsten."
—Summertime
Dear Krisberter:
Worked for Mr. and Mrs. Smith, right? Except in that case, Pitt was already a married dude. It certainly helps keeping R.P. as single as possible (and theoretically attainable) to keep his fans drooling over him. And Mormon God forbid Rob and Kristen publicly get together and publicly break up...that ruins the whole facade of their so-in-love characters, Edward and Bella.
Dear Ted:
Five words: MTV Movie Awards, Best Kiss. Are Robsten a shoo-in win? Don't the winners have to kiss on stage? Or will New Moon filming get in the way?
—Urmy
Dear Kiss Off:
We're crossing our fingers for a Robsten win! But even if they fly on down, don't expect any televised lip-locking. We're a long way off from that.
Dear Ted:
Big fan. I read the A.T. everyday. Lately most of what I seem to be reading on your site is about Twilight, so against my better judgment I decided to give it a shot and actually watch the movie. Well, that's two hours of my life that I will never get back. Sure, Rob is a hottie and all, but come on, is that really what all the fuss is about? Why are there so many people obsessed with this? I really don't get it!
—Claude
Dear Indifferent:
Moody, yearning teenage love. We totally get it. Teens rule the world, babe, as if Miley and the JoBros being billionaires didn't already tip ya off.
Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Divine Orlando Bloom? It definitely looks like that chick he is with is a beard! Process of elimination.
—ponder.this
Dear Not Bloom:
You haven't eliminated every hunk just yet, deary!
Dear Ted:
With the coming end of television series Prison Break, things seem to have gotten really quiet with Wentworth Miller. What's your take on that?
—centaur1661
Dear Wondering Wenty:
If he's intent on keeping his name in the news, this had better be the calm before the storm. A juicy new role? A totally ridiculous hookup? Whatever it is, dude had better hurry before we forget about him!
Dear Ted:
OK, it's official: The thousands of fans posting comments to any item about Robsten should have their own designation, like Robstenaloonies? Kristaloonies? Pattaloonies? I can't wait for this craze to be over.
—jmayfield2057
Dear Nickname Patrol:
It's only just begun! And we've already got the Brangeloonies. And how about Robstenites? Does that roll off the tongue for ya?
Dear Ted:
Is Hard-Nippled Nick Ryan Reynolds?
—AG
Dear Dimpled Curious:
Wrong hard-nippled dude for Nick, sorry.
Dear Ted:
I know you've said before the Twilight gang doesn't have Twitter, Facebook, etc. But I came across some Twitter profiles that look pretty legit: pattinsonRT (his is locked), kristenstewart9, nhoustonreed, etc. They look like they were started last month sometime. Since you're a Twitterer (and one I personally follow), what's your take?
—Jenn S.
Dear Twithead:
We think enough fans are that obsessed with them to keep creating profiles in their honor. And we also think the Twi crew is smart enough to use usernames that don't include any part of their actual monikers.
Dear Ted:
I was formerly involved in the Miss Delaware America Organization, and you couldn't be more right about the whole Perez vs. Carrie Prejean dustup. It was a valid question to ask, especially to her since she was repping California. One thing we teach our contestants is how to answer questions; she chose to voice her opinion in a way that alienated others rather than trying to graciously remain neutral on a hot-button issue and she was judged accordingly. It is not like Perez was the only judge.
—Disgusted in Del.
Dear Lesser of Two Evils:
So what's worse, answering a question with an unpopular opinion (for that audience, anyway), or not picking a side at all? I can't even tell anymore.
Dear Ted:
As you are undoubtedly the man in the know, I must know: I thought at one time Renée Zellweger was a down-to-earth, semi-normal gal. Now I'm not so sure. What's her deal?
—Jason
Dear Where's Renée?
She became A-list and never looked back. She and J.Lo should hang out.
Dear Ted:
When actors have to act like they're on drugs or drunk, do they really "act"? Or do they do a little Method acting and dabble in the good stuff?
—Ted's Girl
Dear Method Missy:
A good actor never has to. But that doesn't mean they never will! At least we know the cast of Weeds is mostly filled with superprofessional types.
Dear Ted:
I and several others have our suspicions on your Blind Vice on who Judas and Dash are, and if our guess is right about this, how do we now that your sources are correct? Could it be that these are just buds and someone on your end is getting it wrong?
—Susan, N.J.
Dear Dubious:
Nope, but nice try there!
Dear Ted:
I was at the optometrist today picking up a new pair of glasses when low and behold, your face was staring at me in an advertisement for eyewear! That was the last place I expected to see my favorite dirt peddler. Didn't know you were whoring out your handsome mug to the highest bidder. You looked fantastic, even with glasses. Thought you'd like to know...Still hate the yellow.
—Cherie, Reno
Dear Glasses Gal:
Still with the yellow bashing? That's as old as hating all our Twilight posts!
Dear Ted:
Is Toothy Tile Ryan Gosling?
—Leah
Dear Wrong on Ryan:
Rachel McAdams was no beard of Toothy's.
Dear Ted:
I noticed in the pics taken of R. Pattz and K. Stew at the Sam Bradley concert, she isn't wearing the ring that her "boyfriend" gave her...hmmm.
—khayes916
Dear No Ring Around the Rosy:
Was it also a purity ring? That seems about as likely as how happy she and Michael supposedly are!
Dear Ted:
I'm sick of this "Miss California stood up for her beliefs" crap. People need to get a better understanding of what free speech means. It doesn't mean spreading hate. If she had stood up there and said, "I believe all women are born to serve men, and all black people are natural slaves" everyone would have had a fit. She said basically she doesn't believe my partner of 13 years and I should commit to each other. WTF? And we're supposed to turn around and say, "Oh, it's her beliefs?" She's a hater.
—kagiso
Dear Hater Hater:
Tell that to Trump!