YASUYOSHI CHIBA/AFP/Getty ImagesThere probably isn't a single person out there who hasn't had a questionable job before. Maybe you were the dancing sign holder outside of a liquidating mattress emporium. Perhaps you cleaned toilets with a toothbrush at Denny's. Maybe you were a mascot at Chuck E. Cheese. Whatever you did, it was weird, but you got paid. Maybe you even liked it? We're not judging. Odd jobs at The Olympics are no different. From towel boys to earring divers, Rio has their fair share of strange positions.
If you've ever wanted to hand out thousands of condoms to Olympic athletes, or mop the sweat of basketball players, you may consider applying to work at the next Olympic games. Seriously. Take a look at our roundup of the weirdest (and sometimes seemingly useless) jobs in Rio. While they're not the shiniest jobs in the world, you occasionally wind up on TV, get to meet famous athletes and attend the freakin' Olympics. So, yeah. Huge plus. No big deal. Some of the jobs on the other hand (this is for you, towel boy) will give you a new appreciation for your 11th-grade job as a Dilly Bar dipper at Dairy Queen. Trust us.
1. Tennis Towel Boy. Woof. This one sounds like quite the chore. One towel boy at The Olympics tells E! News that their main job is to keep the hands of tennis players sweat-free. Sounds thrilling, right? "We change the towel to a fresh one after they whip. Actually, it's a pretty good sprinting workout to run back and forth." That all sounds fine and dandy, except when it doesn't. The dark side of being a towel boy? They get to deal with the athlete's bad attitude. He adds, since tennis is such an intense game, Olympians moods can easily turn sour when things aren't going their way. Who gets to be their on-court therapist? You guessed it. Forget manners, too. Players sometimes throw the towel back without saying thank you. "Sometimes they yell cause if we don't give the towel fast enough, it messes them up. I think it's mainly in their head, though." Sheesh. We feel for these guys!
2. Useless Lifeguard. A lifeguard at the Olympics tells E! News, "Sometimes I even wonder why professional athletes need us, but it's really just in case something happens." What might happen that a professional swimmer couldn't handle? The lifeguard mentions cramps, heart attacks, and hitting their head at the bottom or end of the pool. Not so useless after all! Rescuing Phelps "would be pretty cool," the lifeguard says, "but he is so good I know that would never happen, as well as I hope it never happens." The lifeguard says it "would be a game changer in any of our lifeguard careers. 'I saved Phelps' (laughs) we all joke about that." Aww.
3. Condom Guys. Practicing safe sex is always the way to go. Especially if you plan to Tinder up a storm like the athletes in Rio this year. Believe it or not, the games have staff members dedicated to handing out condoms and refilling condom machines. Zika is no match for these horndog Olympians thanks to the help of the condom crew. When it comes to Olympic hookups, an insider tells E!, "It's pretty intense…some athletes wait until after their competition [to party] and then others have hookups between practices because they say sex actually helps them reach for the gold." Daaanggg. The contraceptives are totally free, which is a v. smart move. Let's be real. These peeps are the real winners of the Olympics this year, wouldn't you say so?
4. Lost earring diver. Talk about a day saver. When Olympic swimmer Kathleen Baker lost her pearl earring at the bottom of the pool, this handy scuba diver came to her rescue. Their job is exactly as it looks. Anytime an athlete loses something in the pool; they can count on one of these buddies to rescue their goods. As if winning the gold in the Women's 4x100m medley relay, and the silver in the 100m backstroke wasn't awesome enough, she got her earring back. Can this guy come to our house and find our keys every morning, though?
5. Mopper of sweatiness. Athletes get sweaty, and sweat is slippery. Boom. Behold the sweat moppers. Sure it's gross as hell, but somebody has to do it! You've probably seen these guys if you've ever watched or been to a basketball game. Here they are, soaking up sweat like there is no tomorrow. There needs to be a medal ceremony to recognize all of the people working these odd jobs.
6. Arrow people. Forget Tonga's oiled up flag man! The arrow people were the real stars of the Opening Ceremony. Maybe you didn't notice them, but they were the backbone of the event. You see, the arrow people are responsible for guiding those in the ceremony in the right direction. Totally nifty, right? Who thinks of this stuff?! A genius, that's who.
7. Crap carrier. Ah, yes. The beloved carrier of athletes stuff. Whether it's a jacket, shoes, phone, or you name it; these volunteers are down to carry the load of everyone's favorite Olympians. Like any of these odd jobs, they're a great way to get a taste of the Olympic world if you dream of competing one day. The Huffington Post notes, the carriers hold on to a runner's belongings all the way from the start to the finish line. You can't really win a race with a phone in your hand and a jacket on, so way to go crap carriers! They may or may not be partially responsible for making sprinter Usain Bolt into an epic meme.
Cheers to those who work hard behind the scenes in Rio. We see you!
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