BravoBoy, not even an appearance from Faye Resnick could save that snoozefest of a Real Housewives of Beverly Hills season finale, huh?
While our long national nightmare over who said Munchausen's first is far from over (we've still got that three-part reunion special to look forward to, after all!), the ladies of the 90210 wrapped up the season in a fashion that's been pretty par for the course this year: An awkward party followed by everyone gathering to discuss Yolanda Hadid. Only this time, of course, the conversation was about her divorce from David Foster.
Before we could get to that "two months later" jump, we had to endure one final party after the ladies returned home from Dubai. And Kyle Richards' party out in La Quinta was super awkward, right? We had the feuding Lisas (Vanderpump and Rinna) in one room for the first time since they had to apparently be separated on the plane home. (Thanks for the hot goss, Erika Girardi!) We had Kim Richards on the scene, surprising Rinna for the first time since last year's tense reunion. We had Yo finally back in the mix to face down everyone who'd been running their mouths about her illness. And we had Faye. It had all the makings of an explosive Real Housewives party—really, one for the books.
And instead, it sort of just fizzled out.
Rinna apologized to Yo for saying she was more manipulative than LVP, and Yo politely accepted. LVP laughed off Rinna's accusations of starting the Munchausen's talk, and Yo seemed to think she was telling the truth. Kim asked Rinna why it would bother her that Yo would spend time with her and Brandi Glanville, and Rinna had the audacity to say, with a straight face, "It's my own business and I don't feel comfortable sharing that with you, to be honest," as if she's stuck to only her own business this entire season. But then she just walked away, denying us a repeat of her Amsterdam glass smashing. Eileen Davidson seethed in the corner over the fact that more people weren't yelling at LVP, but, in true Eileen fashion, she just whispered to Rinna about it on the sidelines.
And then everyone went back to their Palm Springs hotel, wondering what the point of the evening really was, while Kyle, Kim, Faye, and surprise guest Camille Grammer danced alone by the pool. Seriously.
From there, we jumped two months ahead to Yo and David's divorce announcement. We watched as the ladies met in small groups to discuss their shock over the news. Rinna got another opportunity to psychoanalyze a situation that's none of her "own business," telling Eileen, "She just made sure we knew a lot about her sickness, but we did not know that her marriage was falling apart." But we really didn't hear anything we haven't already heard about the divorce in the four months its been since they announced it. No talk of why it happened. No talk of why it happened. Just the simple: "If you stop making each other happy, than you shouldn't be together." Boring. Respectable, but boring.
Wake us when the reunion starts.
Spare Parts:
The episode ended with Yo zipped up in some sort of garment bag moonlighting as some sort of alternative treatment, no doubt, chatting with her daughter Gigi on FaceTime, like it was a perfectly normal way to sit in your kitchen. It is not.
"Just laugh at the silly cow. She's not the full ticket." Ken's British insults are somehow sillier and crueler than their American counterparts. That's a feat.
"Oh, just what I'm good at doing, helping diffuse. Fabulous." Look, some self-awareness from Faye.
"Bye, Faye. I'm sorry I've been rude to you."
The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills airs Tuesdays at 9 p.m. on Bravo.
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