Kidz Bop

Kidz Bop

Writing about pop culture is cool and all, but we now have a new dream job: We want to be the person who edits the dirty lyrics for Kidz Bop.

We realized our new life goal when we were doing research on the most ridiculous and often confusing lyric changes that are made when a song gets put onto a Kidz Bop compilation album. Whoever is in charge of these tweaks must feel like a true artist. We want to be that artist!

Look, we totally understand editing songs that aren't appropriate for children. But if every other lyric needs to be changed or if the song has strong sexual or drug references, why include it on the album at all?! It's supposed to be for kids around 11 or 12 years old, so if a song talks about morphine, maybe you just skip that one instead of trying change the lines to make it cleaner? Most of the time, it just sounds awkward and weird.

Those poor tweens. Well, at least this last round of edits didn't include "bringing anal back" like people originally thought. Anyway, here are our favorite ridiculous edits from Kidz Bop songs:

1. Ed Sheeran – "Sing"

Original Lyrics: "I told her my name and said, ‘It's nice to meet ya'/ and then she handed me a bottle of water with tequila"
Edited Lyrics: "I told her my name and said, "It's nice to meet ya'/ and then she handed me a bottle of water, said ‘nice to meet ya'"

2. Lorde - "Royals"

Original Lyrics: "But every song is like gold teeth, grey goose, trippin' in the bathroom"
Edited Lyrics: "But every song is like gold teeth, gold goose, singin' in the bathroom"

3. Shop Boyz - "Party Like a Rockstar"

Original Lyrics: "On the yacht with Marilyn Manson/ with a skull belt and wallet chain"
Edited Lyrics: "On the yacht, yeah, we relaxin'/ with a cool belt and wallet chain"

4. John Legend - "All of Me"

Original Lyrics: "Love your curves and all your edges/ all your perfect imperfections"
Edited Lyrics: "Love your words and all your edges/ all your perfect imperfections"

5. Katy Perry – "Hot N Cold"

Original Lyrics: "Yeah you PMS like a bitch, I would know" … "We fight, we make up"
Edited Lyrics: "Yeah you change your mind, I would know" … "We hug, we make up"

6. Bruno Mars - "It Will Rain"

Original Lyrics: "If you ever leave me, baby, leave some morphine at my door/ cause it will take a whole lot of medication, to realize what we used to have, we don't have it anymore/ there's no religion that could save me"
Edited Lyrics: "If you ever leave me, baby, leave our memories at my door/ cause it will take a whole lot of remembering, to realize what we used to have, we don't have it anymore/ there's no decision that could save me"

7. One Direction - "Story of My Life"

Original Lyrics: "She told me in the morning she don't feel the same about us in her bones"
Edited Lyrics: "She told me in the hallway she don't feel the same about us in her bones"

8. Lady Gaga ft. Beyonce - "Telephone"

Original Lyrics: "Out in the club and I'm sippin that bubb/ and you're not gonna reach my telephone"
Edited Lyrics:
"Out in the club and I'm eating that grub/ and you're not gonna reach my telephone"

9. Macklemore and Ryan Lewis - "Thrift Shop"

Original Lyrics: "Probably should have washed this, it smells like R. Kelly's sheets"
Edited Lyrics: "Probably should have washed this, it smells like my baseball cleats"

10. Train - "Drive By"

Original Lyrics: "Oh but that one night, was more than just right"
Edited Lyrics: "Oh but that one day, was more than OK"

11. The Script - "Breakeven"

Original Lyrics: "I'm still alive but I'm barely breathin'/ just prayed to a God that I don't believe in"
Edited Lyrics: "I'm still alive but I'm barely breathin'/ just prayin' to a thing that I don't believe in"

12. Icona Pop - "I Love It"

Original Lyrics: "I crashed my car into a bridge / I watched, I let it burn"
Edited Lyrics: "You drove your car across the bridge
/ I watched, you let it turn"

13. Jessie J - "Domino"

Original Lyrics: "We can do this all night/ damn this love skin tight"
Edited Lyrics: "We can dance here all night/ turn this club up real tight"

14. Bruno Mars - "The Lazy Song"

Original Lyrics: "Meet a really nice girl, have some really nice sex/ and she's gonna scream out 'This is great'"
Edited Lyrics: "Meet a really nice girl, send a really nice text/ and she's gonna write back 'You're so great'"

15. Nicki Minaj - "Starships"

Original Lyrics: "Can't stop/ we're higher than a mother--ker"
Edited Lyrics: "Can't stop/ we're Kidz Bop and we're taking over"

16. Flo Rida – "Wild Ones"

Original Lyrics: "If I took you home, it'd be a home run"
Edited Lyrics: "If I took you out, it would be such fun"

17. Paramore - "Ain't It Fun"

Original Lyrics: "You can ring anybody's bell to get what you want"
Edited Lyrics: "You can ring anybody's cell to get what you want"

18. Carly Rae Jepsen – "Call Me Maybe"

Original Lyrics: "I beg and borrow and steal"
Edited Lyrics: "I beg and borrow and feel"

19. Kesha – "Tik Tok"

Original Lyrics: "Before I leave brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack"
Edited Lyrics: "Before I leave brush my teeth, then I go and pack"

20. Justin Timberlake – "Not a Bad Thing"

Original Lyrics: "When someone cuts your heart open with a knife/ now you're bleeding"
Edited Lyrics: "When someone breaks your heart open a lot/ now you're hurting"

21. One Republic – "Counting Stars"

Original Lyrics: "I feel something so right by doing the wrong thing"
Edited Lyrics: "I feel something so right by doing the right thing"

22. Lady Gaga - "Born This Way"

Original Lyrics: "A different lover is not a sin"
Edited Lyrics: "A different viewpoint is not a sin"

23. Meghan Trainor – "All About That Bass"

Original Lyrics: "Yeah, my momma she told me don't worry about your size/ she says, 'boys they like a little more booty to hold at night'"
Edited Lyrics: "Yeah, my mama she told me 'don't worry about your size/ she says, 'Don't let it keep you at home in your room at night'"

24. Hot Chelle Rae - "Tonight, Tonight"

Original Lyrics: "Woke up in the morning with a strange tattoo"
Edited Lyrics: "Woke up in the morning with a stranger hairdo"

25. Macklemore - "Can't Hold Us" 

Original Lyrics: "But that's what you get when Wu-Tang raised you"
Edited Lyrics: "But that's what you get when Kidz Bop raised you"

Well, now we know. That is what you get when Wu-Tang raised you.

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