Parting is such sweet sorrow.
After Teen Mom 2's tumultuous second season, tonight's finale was poignant, bittersweet—and predictably infuriating.
So how did Jenelle, Leah, Chelsea and Kailyn close the book on this chapter of their reality lives?
Although she didn't brawl with her fellow patients, Jenelle still managed to shock us within the healing confines of the Malibu Horizons rehab center. While sharing her personal information in her intake interview, the Teen Mom trainwreck dropped the bombshell that she has a brother (!) who suffers from schizophrenia and bipolar disorder.
That sure brings a whole new dimension to her dysfunctional relationship with mom Barbara. After a conferencing Barbara in on a therapy session, Jenelle's doctor—who must watch Teen Mom religiously—deduces, "She attaches to you through the fighting, that's how you show love." Hopefully with Jenelle's return baby Jace will see a different kind of love in their high-decibel household.
Jenelle arrived at Horizons with THC in her urine and absolute denial about her addiction. "It's not really a problem for me," she explained. "The only problem with it is I'm not allowed to smoke." Ahem. But with yoga, therapy and medication to manage her newly diagnosed bipolar disorder, Jenelle is ready to return home. Her last drug test comes back completely clean, and when asked whether she still craved the drug. "No, I have no cravings," Jenelle insisted in her signature monotone. Although that rings about as true as the prospect of Kieffer staying out of jail, Jenelle's loving reunion with her mom and adorable son offered some hope for a brighter future.
Leah, meanwhile, is devastated at the end of her marriage to Corey. Their divorce proceedings mean a lot of "lah-yer stuff" and so many tears that we wonder why Leah still wears so much mascara. In an epic bit of bad timing, Leah's mom receives copies of their wedding pictures while the newlywed cries about the end of her six-month marriage. In the end, Corey is crying just as hard as Leah after she moves out and he's left alone, without his daughters and most of their furniture. At least he retained custody of the dryer?
For the first time in years, Kailyn too finds herself single after "things went too far" with Jo (her euphemism, apparently, for "having sex in the shower"). Realizing she still has feelings for her baby daddy, she comes clean to BF Jordan but manages to be shocked that he is angry instead of sympathetic to her unique plight as a co-parent. Instead, Jordan packs his stuff and walks out, even as Kailyn insists going "too far" doesn't mean cheating. "Good results came out of" her relationship with Jo, Kailyn points out, to which Jordan retorts, "You're right, these are phenomenal results." His parting shot as he walks out the door? "I hope you can live with yourself."
Well played, sir, well played.
Speaking of play, Kailyn apparently didn't get the memo that Jo is a player now and has no interest in getting back together with his baby mama. "I'm not trying to commit to any woman right now," he says coolly. Can you blame the rising rapper otherwise known as N.I.C.K. B (aka Nerd in a Cool Kid's Body)? Sorry, Kail, you'll just have to be content with being one of Jo's "groupies."
Groupie might be a good word to describe Chelsea's self-destructive relationship with baby daddy Adam, with whom she reunites for the zillionth time. She's finally on the way to passing her GED, and then she agrees to see Adam when he picks up their daughter. When he invites Chelsea to join them, she asks, "Do you want me to?"—like a puppy begging for attention after being kicked across the yard. When they meet up again for a romantic motorcycle ride, we honestly don't know which is more hazardous for Chelsea: getting back together with Adam or speeding down the highway without a helmet.
What did you think of Teen Mom 2's second season? What surprised you the most?