Weekend Mail! Hollywood's Hottest Couples and Dirtiest Double Standards

Readers wonder why Brad Pitt isn’t called a dirty old man and if Robert Pattinson is cheating

Dear Ted:
Why does everyone always say Jennifer Aniston dates younger guys but no one points out that Brad Pitt is 12 years older than Angelina Jolie? Maybe it's because Angelina looks like she has 10 years on Jennifer, even though Jennifer is six years older. It's hard to believe Jolie is only 36.
—godschild013

Dear Double-Bitchy:
Hey, I'm with ya on the first point, babe. It's totally whack that guys are allowed to step out with all the young things they want—and they're encouraged. But women? They're labeled "cougars" and "cradle robbers." Double standard, sexist Hollywood at its best. As to your second point, honey, all I have to say is I'm glad I'm not raising 262 children. You try it on for size.

Dear Ted:
Is Chubster Hunkster Robert Pattinson? The tabloids are always hinting that he fools around behind Kristen Stewart's back.
—whiiteajk

Dear Inhale Much?:
Babe, what are you smoking? If you think Robert Pattinson's a chubby hunky type, then my real name is Bella Swan. Get real. No, not even close that R.Pattz is the cheating Chubster, and besides, nothing's going on between Rob and Kris that they both don't know about. They're totally cool!

Dear Ted:
I'm curious about what's going on with my crush, Seth MacFarlane. I saw you said something about him not being lonely these days. What's that about?
—klmacpherson

Dear MacConcerned:
Honey, trust us, he's not. You should see the measurements on that lack o' loneliness.

Dear Ted:
Many posts have been reported all day. Why no deletions? Is this how you're cleaning up the board? You'll end up with only nasty posters here, the rest will leave. Then you'll have nothing.
—vraugas

Dear Who's Being Nasty?
Let's see, we cleaned up the boards yesterday a bit later than we normally get to, but apparently that wasn't fast enough. Pardon us for doing our best while we do our jobs. For the record, we clean up a lotta crappy talk. A lot.

Dear Ted:
Madonna is boring with a capital B. Always was and will be, but unfortunately, not in her own mind.
—Mary Elizabeth

Dear Dress You Down:
Oh, darlin', if you think Madonna herself is boring, I hate to imagine of what you think of Lady Gaga?! It's just Madonna's movies that I'm worried about.

Dear Ted:
Is it weird that my favorite thing about Kristen Stewart is her potty mouth?
—Heather

Dear F--k No:
Nothing more need be said.