In today's installment of Daddy Dearest...
Michael Lohan is asking the judge overseeing daughter Lindsay's DUI case to send her to rehab, not the slammer, for violating the terms of her probation by missing multiple court-mandated alcohol-education classes.
In the letter, lawyer Lisa Bloom writes that the elder Lohan "is gravely concerned about the deterioration he has observed in Lindsay's condition over the past year and especially the last few months."
Lindsay's not exactly helping to dispel that image with her party-hearty lifestyle and gun-toting fashion shoots.
"It is clear to Michael that the current court-ordered condition of her probation—namely, that she is required to only attend alcohol education classes—is insufficient," Bloom continues. "Michael therefore respectfully requests that the Court order Lindsay into an inpatient residential drug and alcohol treatment program."
Noting Michael's own struggles as a recovering addict, Bloom says he believes the best place the 23-year-old thesp could get the proper treatment she needs right now would be at a private rehab facility in New York. (Curiously, he suggests Oheka Castle, which is technically a hotel—and the place Kevin Jonas got married—not a treatment center.)
"Michael is confident the doctors there will detox her, specialists will give her blockers and therapists will help her address psychological issues," Bloom writes. "Unlike other rehab programs Lindsay has been to, this facility would also include family therapy, which is much needed, Michael believes."
According to Bloom, because the center is located in New York, Lindsay's dad said it would enable the entire family to take part in her recovery and he "would make attending family therapy classes with his daughter his No. 1 priority." (Think of it as daddy day care.)
All this because Michael really, really cares.
"It is painful for a father to ask a court for stricter controls on his own beloved daughter, but the alternative—that Lindsay becomes the next Hollywood statistic, the next Heath Ledger, Michael Jackson or Anna Nicole Smith—is far worse," Bloom writes.
If Judge Marsha Revel denies his request, Michael is urging the judge to at least have Lindsay submit to random, court-ordered drug testing and an extended probation.
Lindsay's next progress report is scheduled for May 20.
Meanwhile, Lindsay revealed via Twitter that she and the rest of her family are mourning the death of Dina Lohan's brother and Lindsay's uncle Chris over the weekend.
"My mom's brother, my uncle-whos amazing, just passed- may he rest in peace," she tweeted. "Rushing to see..I don't know how to feel as I'm rushing home to my mom's house after just wrapping work nearly 3hours ago or less.... I feel sick…Did Billy Joel curse us when he said, "only the GOOD die young??" "
No word on cause of death.
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Lindsay's not the only star making a cameo in our Court Appearances gallery.