Please tell me that Charlie Sheen's costume mustache is the lamest celebrity disguise ever used.
First of all, get your facts straight. It's Charlie Sheen's mariachi 'stache and, as of Friday, newly shorn head, that are in the running for lamest celebrity disguise ever used. (For the record, Sheen's spinmeister, Stan Rosenfield, has declared that we're all wrong; the 'stache was a joke, see. Get it? No? Your fault.)
But I have news for you, Carly. Celebrities do employ quite a few disguises (see Lindsay above), including one that is definitely in the running for the oddest:
Now, according to experienced celebrity photographers, most stars don't really bother with serious master-of-disguise crap when they're going out. They don't have much time for Sherlock Holmes prosthetics and charcoal streaks that would allow them to walk the streets as mere chimney sweeps.
Usually a star throws on a hoodie, or something similar, and hopes for the best.
"DiCaprio always has a cap pulled way down low over his face when he's out in public," E! News field producer Chris Hall tells me. "I have never seen celebrities wearing a mustache before—but big glasses with hats, I have seen a lot of that."
There are exceptions, of course.
"I do sometimes use a disguise to get out of the house when I can borrow my friend's car and get by the paparazzi that sit outside my house," Jessica Biel told the Calgary Herald. "I have, like, a whole wardrobe, a wig and scarf and glasses. I'm considering a nose piece, actually. I don't see why not."
Michael Jackson used to love wearing disguises to go out shopping. In fact, his fake mustache and wig would backfire on him in places like jewelry stores, which don't like random people browsing in obvious disguises. During one visit to a Simi Valley, Calif., jewelry store, Jackson had to remove the disguise and show his true self.
But the most creative use of disguise may come from Nicole Kidman. A shaky—if not very entertaining—report attributed to the website Women First quotes the actress thusly:
"I go out in a wig, put on an Irish accent and have friends call me by a different name, all so I can get a little privacy for a while. I really like looking around market stalls, you can get some really nice stuff there, although I can never really haggle over prices."
Accents: Now there's a creative disguise.
A little facial hair ain't so bad, right Grizzly Guys?