Rise 'n' Shine: Let the Madonna-Guy Ritchie Gossiping Fun Begin!

Thu., Oct. 16, 2008 9:14 AM PDT by

Madonna, Guy Ritchie Jason Kempin/WireImage.com

• Madonna introduced her song "Miles Away" with this dedication: "This song is for the emotionally retarded. Maybe you know some people who fall into that category. God knows I do." Hmmm, who do you think she's talking about?

• Guy Ritchie reportedly wants "not one penny" of Madge's $521 million fortune, but he's worth about $60 million on his own so he just might make it through this divorce OK.

• When Guy was letting the pain out, he allegedly told a friend, "I'm afraid the laughs in our life together were long gone. She's obsessed with her own public image, obsessed with being seen as some kind of global soothsayer."

• Madonna's friends never thought their relationship would last, because "in the end it was all just an elaborate game of dress up, a rollicking charade." Does this mean she'll go back to her American accent?

• Apparently Guy and Madonna couldn't even pull it together for Gwyneth Paltrow, who is said to be pretty torn up about the whole thing.

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