Jason Merritt/Getty ImagesFarrah Fawcett never wanted to be the poster child for living with cancer. It just turned out that way.
In an interview conducted in August and published today in the Los Angeles Times, the erstwhile Charlie's Angels star has spoken out about her involuntarily public battle with anal cancer, which included more than one privacy-breaching experience after hospital employees leaked her medical records to the tabloids.
"It's much easier to go through something and deal with it without being under a microscope," said the 62-year-old star. "It was stressful. I was terrified of getting the chemo. It's not pleasant. And the radiation is not pleasant.
"People call, 'How are you?' 'How do you feel?' 'We're praying for you.' 'Do you still have your hair?' 'What do you feel like?' When every single call is that kind of call…It's all you talk about. It's all-consuming. Then your quality of life is never the same."
And neither, Fawcett said, was her level of privacy.
Back in December 2006, shortly after Fawcett's diagnosis, the National Enquirer ran a story titled "Farrah Begs: 'Let Me Die.' " Not only was the quote false, but it devastated her morale.
"God, I would never say something like that. To think that people who did look up to me and felt positive because I was through it, too, and yet I was strong…it just negated all that."
The actress set up her own sting operation at UCLA Medical Center to prove the private information was coming out of the hospital.
"I actually kept saying for months and months and months, 'This is coming from [UCLA].' I was never more sure of anything in my life."
To prove it, she withheld the information that her cancer had returned in May 2007 from everyone in her life. Only she and her doctor knew, and four days later, it turned up in the National Enquirer.
The hospital investigated the matter and discovered that an employee, someone who was not a part of Fawcett's medical team, had accessed the star's file more than her own doctors had. The hospital cited privacy and their "responsibility to protect [their] employees" in refusing to name the law-breaking worker.
After several months, the hospital fingered Lawanda Jackson, who pleaded guilty in December to felony violation of federal medical privacy laws. She died in March before she was sentenced.
Fawcett is now seeking criminal charges against the National Enquirer, which allegedly paid Jackson $4,600 for the info.
"They obviously know it's like buying stolen goods," Fawcett said. "They've committed a crime. They've paid her money."
Fawcett also had strong words for the hospital, which she says attempted to pressure her into setting up a foundation in her name at the medical center—a move not only inconceivably timed on behalf of UCLA, she said, but also "suspicious."
"They acted like nothing happened," Fawcett said, adding that the foundation strong-arming began around the same time her medical leaks came to light.
"It's like, 'This will make it all OK.' I felt that all of a sudden, they were trying awfully hard to push it. Too pushy. In other words, it made me suspicious."
Fawcett, who, partner Ryan O'Neal revealed last week, has lost her hair and essentially stopped all cancer treatment, reiterated that she's "a private person" and would have much preferred battling her disease out of the public eye.
"It would be good if I could go and heal and then, when I decided to go out, it would be OK," she said. "It seems that there are areas that should be off-limits."
Still, she is hoping to find a positive reason why her life's journey took such a public turn. "I'm holding onto the hope that there is some reason that I got cancer and there is something—that may not be very clear to me right now—but that I will do."
Fawcett had given her interview to the Times with the understanding that the newspaper would hold off on publishing it until her documentary on her battle, Farrah's Story, was set to air. The special will be broadcast on NBC this Friday.
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