Patti's a Pain

Patti Stanger has a lot to say...

By Chelsea Handler Jan 14, 2011 4:00 PMTags
The Millionaire MatchmakerHeidi Gutman/Bravo

Just when I thought Millionaire Matchmaker's Patti Stanger couldn't be more annoying, she proves Chelsea Lately wrong. Patti fancies herself some kind of relationship expert, even though as far as I can tell from what Heather McDonald tells me about her show...since I won't watch it...the people that she sets up on dates have about as much of a shot of making it work as I have of becoming Lindsay Lohan's sober coach. For some reason Patti decided to speak out about Eva Longoria's divorce and what she thinks Eva should do next. She claims that Eva is "angry" and "needs counseling." I don't remember Eva Longoria asking her to stick her nose in her private life, but maybe Patti didn't see the same photos that I saw of Penélope Cruz's hot brother walking around barefoot in Eva's garage. It looks to me like Eva is getting plenty of "counseling" and by "counseling" I mean "penis." Patti also said that she'd heard rumors that Eva cheated on her first husband and that "karma's a bitch." Hinting that someone deserved to be betrayed by her husband is a low blow. In this situation, it isn't karma that's the bitch.