"He's the best actor...He totally wants to sleep with me!"
Even though her character in Black Swan isn't that appealing to her male costar and real-life hubby Benjamin Millepied, Natalie used her baby bump to prove that he really was attracted to her.
It's going to be a night of heavy drinking, or as Charlie Sheen puts it, breakfast."
At the height of the troubled star's problems, Ricky didn't waste any time making him a part of his trademark humor.
"I think I just dropped my heart somewhere between Natalie Portman and Julianne Moore, so if anyone sees that, please give it back to me."
Awww, Chris was so surprised by his win...but only a pro can come up with a composed and witty line like that when put on the spot.
"I get these fourteen-year-old kids coming up to me, vibrating out of their bodies saying how happy Glee makes them. And when I have the time and I'm not eating and don't want to be bothered, I'll give them a moment of my time."
The funnylady reminds us why we love her so much during her much-earned acceptace speech.
"I'm here to take notes from Ricky Gervais for when I host the Oscars."
Hmmm, sorry, but have to say we don't think the 2011 Oscar host's plan worked out too well.
"I'm 62 years old. Am I old enough to win a lifetime achievement award? Yes, I am. Thank you very much."
The visionary director put any speculation about whether or not he was "eligible" quickly to rest.
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"It's nice to have a justifiable excuse for accessorizing."
The Dexter star turned heads when he arrived sporting a knit cap, but kept his sense of humor in the face of his battle with cancer.
"You're really messing up my under-appreciated status here."
Never an actor who lived it up in the limelight, the Crazy Heart star gently told the crowd he had a good thing going before his win for Best Actor.
"I want to change my name to T-Bone. T-Bone Streep!"
Even though she'd just won for her performance in Julie & Julia, the veteran actress had the famous music producer on her mind. At this point, Meryl, you've earned the right to call yourself whatever you want.
"I'm gonna try to make this as brief as I can because, frankly, I have to pee something fierce."
The always-candid director didn't hold back when he made this declaration during his Best Director acceptance speech.
"Marty eats, drinks and sleeps film. I hear there are videos on the Internet of Marty having sex with film."
While presenting Martin Scorsese with the Cecil B. DeMille award, Robert De Niro shared a few things we might not have known about the director: Um, thanks for that.
"Animation is not just for children. It is also for adults who take drugs, so let's have a look at the films that were nominated by drug-taking adults."
When he took the podium to present the award for Best Animated Feature, the former Beatle said what everyone was thinking.
"My American family who are watching, put down the Maker's Mark. Go to bed."
After she picked up a Best Actress trophy for her role in The Blind Side, Sandy tucked her family in with this touching message.
"I really don't want to thank my wife because I could be bussing tables at the Daily Grill right now if not for her. Jesus, what a gig that'd be."
Following his Best Actor, Comedy win for Sherlock Holmes, the outspoken star jokingly mused on other jobs he'd love to have.
"I like a drink as much as the next man—unless the next man is Mel Gibson."
The Brit funnyguy had the audience in stitches when he introduced Gibson to present the award for Best Director.
NEXT GALLERY: 12 years of Golden Globe winners