HBOThis has been a long time coming, and I'm just going to come right out and say it:
I never watched Game of Thrones.
Over the years, I did a few interviews. I watched a few episodes. But I never REALLY watched.
Until recently.
Until now.
If you've followed this column for a while, you might be shocked, or have already stopped reading out of boredom. But I'm so overwhelmed with intense emotion after finally watching the entire Game of Thrones series from the very beginning, I just have to get a few things off my chest.
Game of Thrones launched in April 2011, when I was deep in the throes of taking care of a newborn, a 1-year-old, and my mom, who was sick. I had no time to watch anything other than video monitors and Baby Einstein in between doctor's appointments and hospital visits, and frankly, my life was not my own. The buzz on Game of Thrones was so strong, and I knew, without question, it was the kind of show that, if I had the luxury of time, I would have become completely obsessed with. But the idea of watching this heavy-mythology series from the beginning, when I was getting no sleep, and couldn't remember when I last showered, just seemed impossible. And as the show went on....all the more so. (Plus, in case you've never existed in a world where you aren't getting sleep, and surrounded by daily life-or-death issues among your own family…and I pray you haven't…Let's just say that your mindset is not the best for watching Game of Thrones.)
So, time went on, I kept GOT on my "Someday Soon Dream To-Do List" and then I did the worst possible thing you could possibly do: In order to prep for interviews with the cast at Comic-Con in 2013, which I refused to go in for blindly, I watched season three. Yep. Didn't watch from the beginning. Just jumped right in at season three like a raving lunatic who'd lost her damn mind, and, given the aforementioned life chaos/sleep deprivation, spent the entire 10 hours going: "WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE AND HOW ARE THEY RELATED AND WHAT THE F-- IS THE THRONE AND WHAT THE F--K IS THE GAME?" I searched and searched for flowcharts or some sort of easily consumable character/family/land breakdown online. I never found it. I muddled my way through the interviews (even with, I'm appalled to admit, George R.R. Martin himself--#NOTPROUD), pretending as best I could that I understood the gravity of the Red Wedding, and left that junket feeling more like a sham that I ever have in my 15 years covering television. I was officially the worst. And every mention of Game of Thrones just brought upon a twinge of shame from that day forward.
So much so, that finally, three weeks ago, I decided I couldn't bear it any more and booked extra childcare help (not kidding) so I could hunker down and FINALLY START WATCH GAME OF THRONES FROM THE VERY BEGINNING. I was determined to watch the finale live with the rest of the world and stop feeling like such a giant A-hole.
Purposefully spending less time with your kids to catch up on a TV show? Yep. I did it. Mother of the year? Far from it. But if I'm being totally honest here? IT WAS WORTH IT.
And now that I've seen every minute of all 50 episodes, from the very beginning, I can say without hesitation:
Game of Thrones is quite possibly the best television show that has ever existed. At the very least, up there in the Top 5 of all time.
The wild brilliance of the storytelling. The intricately woven characters (who finally make perfect sense when you watch from the beginning!). The performances that will bring you to your knees. (I could watch Tyrion aiming that arrow, Daenerys riding a dragon, Jon battling walkers until the end of time…if I had all the time.) It's everything TV should be.
So I suppose I'm writing this as a final act to try to rid myself of the lingering GOT shame. (Where is White Canary's "Shame. Shame." woman when you need her for a good public cleanse/humiliation?) I can now say what I've been wanting to say for more than 4 years:
I am a Game of Thrones fan.
I'm new. I'm unseasoned. But like so many of you, I watched Sunday night's finale with my stomach leaping out of my mouth the. Entire. Time.
And ironically enough, thanks to that horribly tragic final moment: I have returned to a state of sleep-deprivation the past two days because who can sleep when [Spoiler] is dead?
Anyway, this is perhaps useful to anyone who hasn't yet started Game of Thrones, or has a loved one who hasn't yet started:
Take it from me. You can do it. You CAN catch up.
And oh, how it's worth it.
Valor marghulis.
P.S. Any lingering thoughts or questions about the finale? We're working on some answers/theories right now (mostly because....who can think of anything else?!) Tweet me @kristindsantos or via my Facebook page.