Ted's bootylicious Entertainment Weekly cover takes a page from Kim Kardashian's Paper magazine shoot—and we gotta say, he's a natural.
The raunchy star is shown balancing a cup of beer—no champagne here, folks—on his rear just like those famous Jean-Paul Goude shots.
And in his article with the mag, Ted promises that the upcoming sequel won't be just another follow-up flop.
"Movie sequels generally suck. Caddyshack II? Just leave it alone. This one's good, though. It's the Aliens of comedy sequels," he explained.
But aside from all of the jokes up Ted's sleeve fur, things touched on a number of personal topics like his hopes for the future and what his perfect day would entail.
"I have a recurring nightmare that my pot is gone. But then I wake up and it's there, so I smoke it in celebration," Ted shared when asked about his biggest fear.
And as far as his dream scenario for a perfect day, he dishes that it would involve, "Riding around in a helicopter with rappers and dropping boxes of sneakers on people. You're welcome!" Sounds like a solid plan.
But as far as Ted's regular morning routine, he admits it's not nearly as glamorous as gifting the world with footwear from the sky.
So what does Ted do post-wake-and-bake?
"1. Go to the health store and get a green smoothie, a couple of veggie sausages, and a cinnamon grain-free chia pudding. 2. Wait outside health store. 3. Huck green smoothie, veggie sausages, and chia pudding at guy with hipster beard. 4. Go get an Irish coffee and f--king doughnuts."
Lovely.