Richard Ducree/The CWTonight on television, a tree got stuck in a guy, the head of a secret government assassin organization made dinner for his daughter and her sex partner, and a vampire and an ex-witch died and ended up in a Bill Murray movie. In other words, it's just a typical Thursday night of TV. Join us as we rant and rave about it!
RAVE: The Vampire Diaries: We just spent an hour alternating between crying at Elena's emotional misery and laughing at Damon and Bonnie doing crossword puzzles in 1994. We don't regret it.
RANT: The Vampire Diaries: Poor Stefan! Hasn't that guy been through enough without hearing about Elena's undying love for Damon and seeing his new girlfriend's neck get snapped? Can we get a group hug going with Stefan and Mellie from Scandal?
RANT: Scandal: Sorry but after all the torture and weird tongue stuff, we just can't care about Quinn or her weird relationship with Charlie or whatever they're doing on the floor.
RAVE: Scandal: Things we do care about: Mellie. All she wanted to do was absolve that girl of murdering her new husband and the darn police got to it first!
RAVE?: Scandal: When we heard Lost's Sonya Walger was going to be on Scandal, we certainly weren't expecting to meet an old friend of Olivia's who's been sleeping with her teenage daughter's boyfriend. Whatever. We'll take it!
RAVE: Parenthood: We love Joel, but we also love Julia's new boyfriend, so we don't really know how to feel, and this is what we're focusing on instead of the inevitable Braverman death and the inevitable end of this show. Denial will make it just go away, right?
RAVE: How to Get Away with Murder: Tonight we watched Michaela unravel while Wes walked away with the trophy after growing some serious balls. Loving the character development on this show!
RAVE: Bones: We always appreciate a more lighthearted case as a break from all the emotional stuff. We also always appreciate a reason for Booth and Brennan to discuss the pros and cons of S&M.
RAVE: Grey's Anatomy: Something about people with large foreign objects stuck in them makes us happy in a vintage Grey's sort of way. Tonight a guy had a tree through his torso! It was great.
RANT: Grey's Anatomy: Alex lost the board seat, Owen's falling apart, none of the couples are doing so great, and Maggie's mad at Richard for not immediately telling her he was her father. Not even Bailey's selfie with tree dude could make us happy this week.
RANT: Reign: We're pretty sure that with all of the stuff already going on in French court, an angry King Henry ghost is the last thing anybody needs.
So what did you watch tonight? Feel free to rant and rave with us in the comments!