The bloodletting has begun on American Idol .
Randy Jackson may have repeatedly remarked this week that the pleasantly precocious teenage contestants are the forces to be reckoned with in season seven, but 17-year-old Garrett "Leif Garrett" Haley was the first to be sent home on Thursday's results show, the first live send-off of the year.
The Ohio native with the Peter Frampton 'do underwhelmed the judges—and America, apparently—with a slowed-down version of "Breaking Up Is Hard to Do," the usually punchy Neil Sedaka tune, that made Simon Cowell question whether the fair-skinned Haley had been shut up in his bedroom for the past month.
All 24 semifinalists were called upon to perform tunes from the 1960s, marching orders that resulted in both welcome variety (Elvis, Janis Joplin, Three Dog Night and the Doors were among the artists represented) and a couple of duplications (the Turtles' "Happy Together" and Spiral Staircase's "More Today than Yesterday" got both the male and female treatment this week).
And, as usual, the critiques ranged from "hot" to "forgettable," sometimes in reference to the same singer.
Simon predicted that Amy Davis would be in trouble following her "incredibly cabaret" rendition of Connie Francis' "Where the Boys Are"—and he was right.
The 25-year-old trade show model, lacking the Patsy Cline twang that could have made her Idol debut something to remember, according to the judges, was the first girl sent packing despite Paula Abdul's acknowledgment that the camera just loved the leggy brunette.
In the evening's first bit of "it's either her or me" after-the-break drama, Ryan Seacrest revealed that America had also passed on plus-size model Joanne Borgella, another unsurprising choice after her uninspiring rendition of "I Say a Little Prayer."
The 25-year-old beauty from Hoboken, New Jersey, turned in a "very, very substandard" performance, as far as Simon was concerned, and the other in-trouble semifinalist standing beside her, raspy voiced rocker Amanda Overmyer, lived to growl and scat another day.
Last to go was another teen, 18-year-old Colton Berry—the youngster who ultimately stood in the way of the bespectacled Kyle Ensley's ascent to Idol's top 24, much to the chagrin of Simon, who told Berry straight off that he disagreed with the decision to put him through.
And Berry's take on Elvis Presley's "Suspicious Minds" didn't do anything to convince him otherwise.
"A complete waste of time," Simon called the performance, although Randy and Paula kinda liked it.
Among those who actually managed to impress the judges—all three of them—this week were Asia'h Epperson, 19; Raniele Malubay, 20; Alaina Whitaker, 21; Robbie Carrico, 26; David Archuleta, 17; Jason Castro, 20; and Michael Johns, 29.
Then there was 24-year-old Irish-born lass Carly Smithson, who recorded an album for the now-defunct MCA Records in 2001 and couldn't compete in Idol's fifth season because of problems with her work visa.
Randy and Paula were blown away by her seemingly impressive take on "The Shadow of Your Smile," but Simon "didn't get it."
Well, at least Smithson can try to make him understand next week.
Thursday's hour-long show also featured the premiere of the video for Abdul's new single "Dance Like There's No Tomorrow" off of Jackson's new album—so that explains why they've been so buddy-buddy lately—and Idol will continue with its current three-night format for the next two weeks. A top 12 will be selected Mar. 6.
Fox announced earlier this month that the Idol results shows will continue to last an hour even after the field is whittled down to 12. Meaning, lots of clips, commercial breaks and other filler leading up to the eliminated contestant's swan song.
But until then, wannabe Idols are dropping like flies, four at a time.