In case you missed every single other post about the 2013 Emmys and somehow ended up here, in this post, then it is our pleasure to inform you that last night was TV's biggest night: The 65th annual Television of Arts & Sciences Primetime Emmy Awards.
Here is everything you need to know:
There was a red carpet and many celebrities popped in.
The acceptance speeches were short and sweet. Occasionally because the winner wanted it that way.
Merritt Wever dropped the proverbial mic on all Emmy speeches.
Life imitated art (imitating life? We don't know!)
But we loved it.
NPH did a song and dance number.
But it was too little, too late.
Did we mention that Tina Fey and Amy Poehler were there, auditioning to host the 2014 Emmy Awards and every other award show?
Kerry Washington did not win.
Unless you didn't watch the Emmys, in which case, it's our pleasure to tell you that, yes, Kerry Washington won. Yay! Here is a picture of her accepting her Best Actress Emmy from Boardwalk Empire star Bobby Cannavale. Diahann Carroll was there for emotional support.
In actuality, Claire Danes won for Homeland.
But in our minds Kerry did. Sorry 'bout it, Claire.
We don't feel too bad because she gets to go home to this:
An Emmy and Hugh Dancy? Life just isn't fair, is it?
OK, seriously, did we mention Tina Fey and Amy Poehler were there? Because they were. Being perfect.
So was this guy:
At one point, Oprah just started pushing people.
And Kevin Spacey felt the same way we all did.
"This awards show was too damn long."