"9...4...8...1….B'day!"
Today Beyoncé turns 32. Which means, bitch, she's grown. And an icon's day of birth deserves an iconic birthday celebration: As soon as we woke up this morning, we performed the dance break from the extended remix of "Get Me Bodied." We're wearing tear-away House of Deréon with a leotard underneath.
And we've compiled 32 life lessons that we've learned from Bey:
1. A diva is a female version of a hustler.
2. There's nothing wrong with being bootylicious.
3. Work Werk hard.
4. Play hard.
5. All of "Single Ladies" choreography.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10. How to walk with a vengeance.
11. True love exists.
Check her credentials: She's everything you want and everything you need.
12. If you have the choice to sit out or dance, I hope you dance.
13. How to count.
"My baby is a 10 / We dressing to the 9 / He pick me up, with 8," etc.
14. Every girl should have a freakum dress.
15. There's a proper way to announce a pregnancy...
...and this is it.
16. You can have short hair and not care.
#shorthairdontcare
17. But there's nothing like a gorgeous weave whip.
18. Always have a fan handy.
19. How to keep your composure.
Beyoncé got her hair caught in a fan and kept on singing.
20. But it's OK to let loose every once in a while.
21. Grace.
22. Compassion.
23. Humility.
24. Charity.
25. Charity (again).
26. How to twerk.
27. Who runs the world.
Answer: Girls.
28. Who really runs the world.
Answer: Beyoncé.
29. There is only one.
30. There will only ever be one.
31. She's Queen B, King Bey, Sasha Fierce, Third Ward Trill.
32. ALL HAIL BEYONCÉ!