BRAND NEW ON E!
SPOILER ALERT: Do not read any further if you have yet to watch the season finale of New Girl. There are major spoilers ahead, so if you can complain in the comments we will demand you put a dollar in the jar. The rest of you can carry on...
What's that rule? Never upstage a bride on her wedding day?
Well, New Girl couldn't avoid breaking that rule in its season two finale, as Nick (Jake Johnson) and Jess' (Zooey Deschanel) relationship was at the heart of the episode, which also featured Cece's (Hannah Simone) nuptials and a guest appearance from Taylor Swift . Yes, Nick and Jess' smokin' hot chemistry outshines even one of the world's biggest superstars. Such is the power of "Ness."
So did Nick and Jess end the season as an official couple or did Nick's insecurities sink their 'ship before it even began? And did Cece actually get married? And who exactly did Swift play?! Find out...
All In: Nick and Jess are officially a couple, y'all! The two crazy kids actually ended the season together, though it almost didn't happen.
Nick and Jess go to the wedding together as a couple, but Nick is still having insecurities about not being good enough for Jess, thanks to her father Bob (Rob Reiner). Later, when Jess assumes Nick is part of Schmidt and Winston's (Lamorne Morris) pranks at the wedding, she calls him "childish."
"A part of you agrees with your dad. Tell me there isn't a part of you that's scared that I'm too much of a mess…this thing is a mistake; you and me. Just admit it, Jess." (All of this happens while in an air duct looking for a badger, by the way, because: DUH.) "Yes, there is a small part, but…" And that would be when Nick, Jess and the badger fell through the duct and landed on the wedding ceremony.
Before she can finish what she was about to say, Nick suggests they "call it" as "It's not like we're in love or anything." Nicholas Miller, we are very disappointed in you! A hurt Jess agrees before walking off on the verge of tears. Later, Nick is drowning his sorrows at the bar, telling Winston, "I'm going to drink 'cause that's my move." But Winston isn't RSVPing to this pity party, saying, "When things get messy you just run away. there are other moves. Go." (Side-note: Winston is totally the MVP of this episode.)
Cue rom-com moment, right? Well, when Nick runs off to get the girl, it turns out Jess is already prepared to fight for the possibility of what they could one day be. "I want to uncall it. Please can we uncall it," she pleads. "Before you say no…don't say no."
And he doesn't; instead, he kisses her in truly .gif-worthy fashion and it's a total '80s teen movie moment as the duo hop in a limo and drive off together, more than ready for whatever comes next. Well played, Liz Meriwether & Co. Well freakin' played!
Love Triangle Alert: Though Schmidt (Max Greenfield) brings Elizabeth (Merritt Wever), whom we absolutely adore, to the wedding, he soon becomes more focused on sabotaging the nuptials after Cece tells him "with her eyes" that she doesn't really want to Marry Shivrang (Satya Bhabha). Cue pranks such as messing with Shivrang's horse (not a euphemism) and changing the music to "Cotton-Eyed Joe." And, of course, trying to unleash a badger during the ceremony. But Cece ultimately doesn't need Schmidt to interfere on her behalf as she finally admits the truth.
"I can't do this…this isn't what I want. What I want is to be with someone else." Which Shivrang is totally fine with as he also wants to be with someone else: Taylor Swift's Elaine to be exact. "Oh Shivy, I've loved you since the first grade!" Elaine stands up and professes. "And I'm so lonely that I just lie awake at night and write about you in my journal and I paint pictures of you on my easel." (Ha, gotta love a self-aware girl!) The duo then leaves the service together, heading to Vegas to elope.
After the ceremony, Elizabeth calls Schmidt out on still having feelings for Cece, who then shows up and pressures the lovable doofus to make a decision. So who does Schmidt choose? The door, as in he runs away from both ladies. To be continued!
Our Favorite Lines
"I wore this at my high school graduation. I look very handsome. I look like I'm on Miami Vice!"—Nick defending his suit
"I never noticed, but you kind of have a girl butt. Is that weird to say?"—Nick to Winston
"Hey bartender, can you call an ambulance? I'm about to bleed out."—Winston after being attacked by the badger
"I don't think the badger's actually rabid; he's just kind of a dick."—Jess on the badger
What did you think of New Girl's season two finale? Sound off in the comments!