Forget bumpwatch. Angelina Jolie is on broodwatch.
While rumors of an impending adoption/pregnancy/wedding are pretty much always in the ether around Brangelina, all three reports gained traction recently when a new piece of ink turned up on Angie's arm.
As celeb watchers are already well aware, Jolie's most photographed piece of ink is a series of coordinates on her left arm, demarking the latitude and longitude of the birth places of her children. Well, guess what grew by one more pair of coordinates?
As no bump was spotted, tongues immediately started wagging that an adoption was in the works, though quickly morphed into rumors that it was perhaps the location of a secret wedding between her and Brad Pitt. So...are Brad and Angie adding to their brood? Or have they finally legalized their family unit? Believe it or not, these rumors are…
So false! All of them.
Which wouldn't have been that hard to recognize had common sense dared trump hysteria.
The one thing the world united in recognizing, after all, is that the new ink on her arm was indeed a pair of coordinates. And one need only cross-reference the latitude and longitude markings to know that they signify Shawnee, Okla.
Which just so happens to be the birth place of one Mr. William Bradley Pitt.
So, as some wives may agree, yeah, it's the birth place of one of her children. Or, as he's more commonly referred to, her husband.
"If they know that it's latitude and longitude, they would have figured out quickly that is was Brad's birth place," she told Extra. "It doesn't take much investigation to figure that one out. It's Shawnee, Okla."
It seems the problem first reared its head last month when a photo of Jolie meeting with refugees in Libya emerged showing only the first half of the tat: "N 35."
Without the second coordinate, that could have signified either Oklahoma or Algeria. So the press put two and two together and came up with…five, apparently.
And you can feel free to ignore any adoption rumors that will inevitably pop up in the near future: Angelina also told the show that they have no intention of adding to their brood "at this time."
In other words, six is enough.