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The Flash

CW

"I don't have time to bring you up to speed."

Is it just us or is that the most ironic sentence that anyone has ever uttered on The Flash? The fact that it came from Patty, who has a whole heartbreaking backstory of her own after tonight's midseason finale, makes it all the more significant. Girl, you have no idea.  

That episode was jam packed about as hard as it could be jam packed, with villains coming out its eyeballs, if an episode had eyeballs.

First, here's some news that's not at all surprising to us: Harry, AKA Earth 2's Harrison Wells, is now working with Zoom, but his intentions seem to be a little less evil this time, since he's only trying to protect his daughter. Basically, he's going to help Zoom steal Barry's speed, and this is not going to help Barry continue to heal after forgiving his own Harrison Wells in a super touching scene. 

Patty and Barry, meanwhile, have reached that part of their relationship where they have to start letting each other in on their little secrets. Patty's is that her father was killed by Mark Mardon, aka the Weather Wizard, and she became a cop in order to legally exact revenge on the man. Barry's secret, of course, is that he's the fastest man alive (on Earth 1, anyway), but he's not quite ready to tell that secret, unfortunately.

The Flash

CW

Patty was ready to spill, however, and after talking to the Flash, she eventually told her story to Barry, and all we can say is that we hope she sticks around forever. As much as we love Iris, Patty is Barry's perfect match, and we just hope Barry finally decides to tell her the truth soon.

The biggest shocker of the episode, at least for Joe, was that he had a son! Iris finally told both Barry and her dad that she had a brother named Wally, and this led to two beautiful moments.

Even after learning that he had a real, biological son, Joe gave Barry the watch that his father gave him, and referred to him as a son. Then, Joe met Wally, and then we couldn't see what happened next, due to the tears in our eyes. It was beautiful, truly, and made us just a little jealous. Our dad is great. Like a really great guy and dad, but can Joe also be our dad? Can he just be our TV dad? We will take all the dads we can get, tbh.

The Flash

CW

This episode was largely a villainous threesome between Captain Cold, Weather Wizard, and the Trickster, and it was a lot, especially when Zoom was also hanging out in the background. There were so many villains and bombs (in the form of Christmas presents given to children) and secrets to be told that we just found ourselves both over and underwhelmed at the same time. How did Mark Hamill even have time to do this episode? Isn't he very busy with that other thing he does?

Anyway, we also loved Jay pretending that Earth 2 doesn't have things like Christmas and Mistletoe, all just to mess with the totally smitten Caitlin. Their relationship strikes us as weird/too soon, but whatevs. We're happy for them.

Also, Mark Hamill as Santa Claus is the worst thing we've ever seen, but Tom Cavanagh very seriously saying, "That's Mr. Jigglewiggle" when he recognized the stuffed bear in the reflection in Luke Skywalker's eyeball (???) kind of made up for it. 

What did you think of the episode? Sound off in the comments!