Amy Poehler, Will Arnett

Gilbert Carrasquillo/FilmMagic

Breakups are never easy.

In September 2012, Amy Poehler and Will Arnett announced they were separating after nine years of marriage. Since then, the amicable exes have, for the most part, kept quiet about their split—until now.

Poehler addresses the separation in her forthcoming memoir, Yes Please, available Oct. 28. "Imagine spreading everything you care about on a blanket and then tossing the whole thing up in the air," the actress, 43, writes in an excerpt obtained by Hello! magazine. "The process of divorce is about loading that blanket, throwing it up, watching it all spin, and worrying what stuff will break when it lands."

Calling her breakup with Arnett, 44, "too sad" and "too personal" to discuss in detail, the Parks and Recreation star writes, "When you are a person going through a divorce you feel incredibly alone, yet you are constantly reminded by society of how frequently divorce happens and how common it has become. You aren't allowed to feel special, but no one knows the specific ways you are in pain."

Like all good parents, Poehler and Arnett have prioritized their sons' well being. "I am proud of how my ex-husband Will and I have been taking care of our children," the TV star says of brothers Archie, 5, and Abel, 6. "I am beyond grateful he is their father, and I don't think a 10-year marriage constitutes failure."

Poehler says fellow comedian Louis C.K. helped her put what happened into perspective. "'Divorce is always good news because no good marriage has ever ended in divorce,'" she quotes him as telling her. Arnett filed for divorce in April 2014.

Still, the actress says, "Getting a divorce really sucks."

Amy Poehler, Yes Please

Dey Street Books

Poehler later found love with comedian Nick Kroll, whom she began dating in May 2013.

"I have a boyfriend who knows how to settle me," the former Saturday Night Live star says. "He puts his hand on my chest and tells me boring stories…On one of our first nights together I woke up apologizing for my snoring and he pulled out two earplugs he had worn to bed so he could hear what I was saying."

According to Poehler, "It was one of the most romantic gestures I have ever seen."

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