Dr. Phil, Dina Lohan

Robert Voets/CBS

Believe it or not, asking "Are we rolling?" time after time is not the weirdest thing that came out of Dina Lohan's mouth during her beyond bizarre Dr. Phil interview today.

Lindsay Lohan's mother used much crazier and nonsensical language while sitting down with the daytime talk show host.

Although it was hard to pick just five, here's out list of the best—or should we say worst?—quotes from Dina's head-scratching TV appearance.

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Dr. Phil, Dina Lohan

1. Tech Talk: When asked about a time when estranged ex husband Michael Lohan broke into her home, Dina explains to Phil that she didn't have time to call for help during the traumatic incident. "At that point, it happened so fast that it was, I couldn't," she mumbled while blotting her eyes with a tissue. "Cell phones weren't as inept as they are now so I didn't really have that." Phil later calls out Dina's bizarre choice of the word "inept" by saying, "that word doesn't fit in that sentence."

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Dr. Phil, Dina Lohan

2. Little Shoes: One of the more bizarre phrases uttered by Dina is when she breaks after being asked a series of very personal and hard-hitting questions. "You're in your little, tie, your little shoes," she tells Phil while laughing. "I'm in my little tie and my little shoes?" a baffled Phil asks. "What the hell does that mean?" We never get an answer.

Dr. Phil, Dina Lohan

3. Fist Bumpin': After Phil tries to bring Dina down to a more serious level, she scoots closer to Phil to get intimate before losing focus and telling Phil, "So we're friends? Nice shoes. I like them by the way. Can we pound that? Oh, no. OK." Fist bump denied.

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Dr. Phil, Dina Lohan

4. Middle Finger Mama: Having had his fill of the crazy, Dr. Phil begs "be honest with me" and calls Dina a "fraud" and "inauthentic." Dina can find only one way to answer—sticking up both middle fingers and flipping the bird to Phil and everyone else on set. She then smirks, "The truth will prevail," leaving Phil and everyone else scratching their heads.

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Dr. Phil, Dina Lohan

5. Phil's Face: While Dina's impossible to understand quotes were definitely the highlight of the interview, Phil's priceless face almost stole the show. During most of the segment, the doctor sat staring emotionless at Dina with a deadpan face as if he'd given up trying to make sense of the answers the momager was giving him. And if we'd been there, we probably would have made the same face too.

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