Content warning: This story discusses child pornography and molestation.
Jill Duggar is calling out a double standard in her family.
Jill—who left the show in 2017 and distanced herself from her religious family—recently told her dad during a family meeting, "You treat me like I'm a prodigal who's turned her back on you. You treat me worse than you treat my pedophile brother," according to an excerpt from her upcoming book Counting the Cost published by People Sept. 9.
According to Jill, she tried to explain to Jim Bob during the discussion, which was overseen by a mediator, that she never meant to hurt him, but her dad "had his own list of things he wanted to talk about."
"'You sent me a text message, Jill,'" she recalled her father sternly telling her. "'You said I was verbally abusing you. I was so offended by that, too. You know in your heart that's not right. Are you going to apologize for that?'"
Feeling nervous over the confrontation, Jill wrote, "I remembered the message, remembered sending it in the hope that it might wake Pops up to how bad I felt things had gotten, to maybe make him give us a little space and let things calm down. I'd written about not wanting to be verbally abused, which was exactly how I'd felt at the time. I'd felt it in El Salvador as well. I wasn't sure that I could apologize for that. I glanced at Derick as I remained speechless."
She said Jim Bob, 58, was shocked she didn't apologize.
"His voice was loud, and there was an edge to it that I'd rarely heard," Jill continued in part. "Pops took a step toward me, closing the gap. It wasn't a gesture of reconciliation. It was an act of aggression."
Jill said her eyes filled with tears and she alleged that Jim Bob told her, "'You know why you're crying, don't you? Your conscience is talking to you. That's why.'"
"Pops' voice was so loud in my ears. His words were like blows," the TLC star continued. "I instinctively tried to protect myself and block him out."
Jill then brought up a young female fan who had approached Jim Bob before the meeting to ask for a video together, according to People.
"'You want to know why I'm crying?' My voice was cracked, my eyes burning," she remembered of her conversation with her father. "'It's that you think I'm some kind of horrible person just because I wear pants and have a nose ring, and yet you see that girl outside and praise her. That's why I'm crying, Daddy. I'm evolving and changing, just like that girl out there, but you can't see it. You treat me like I'm a prodigal who's turned her back on you. You treat me worse than you treat my pedophile brother.'"
E! News has reached out to Jill, Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar for comment but hasn't heard back.
In response to Jill's book, Jim Bob and Michelle released a statement to People, saying that prefer to handle disagreements in private.
"We love all of our children very much. As with any family, few things are more painful than conflicts or problems among those you love," they said. "We do not believe the best way to resolve conflicts, facilitate forgiveness and reconciliation, or to communicate through difficulties is through the media or in a public forum so we will not comment."
Josh's history of inappropriate behavior surfaced in 2015, when an unearthed police report revealed he had molested underage girls as a teenager.
"Twelve years ago, as a young teenager, I acted inexcusably for which I am extremely sorry and deeply regret," Josh, then 27, said in a statement to People. "I hurt others, including my family and close friends. I confessed this to my parents who took several steps to help me address the situation."
He said he confessed his "wrongdoing" to authorities and his parents arranged for him to attend counseling, noting, "I understood that if I continued down this wrong road that I would end up ruining my life."
At the time, Jill and sister Jessa Duggar came forward publicly as two of the girls Josh had inappropriately touched.
However, Jill said in the 2023 documentary Shiny Happy People: Duggar Family Secrets that "in hindsight," she regrets speaking out about his molestation.
"As far as recovery and damage control, you just feel like the burden and the weight falls on you to, like, help—'cause you're the only one who can," she said, later adding, "If I hadn't felt obligated to, one, do it for the sake of the show, and two, do it for the sake of my parents, I wouldn't have done it."
The former reality star—who now shares sons Israel, 8, Samuel, 6, and Frederick, 14 months, with Derick—is preparing to tell her side of the story in her book Counting the Cost, out Sept. 12.
Get a glimpse inside her family life with Derick in photos here: