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Billy Bob Thorton

Nancy Kaszerman/ZUMA Press

Do-Me Meter, Awful Truth


Billy Bob Thornton decked himself in acid-washed denim (crap, is this '90s trend really back to stay?) while promoting a new CD with his band, the Boxmasters.

We mucho love musicians, but B2T resembles less of a rocker and more of a parolee lookin' to score. Just check out Bill's red-eyed peepers—so crimson he could give the Pineapple Express squad a run for their Mary Jane moola.

Plus, that pubescent patch of hair plopped on Thornton's chin seriously gives us the heebie-jeebies. The guy must be some a pro with the sweet talk to have gotten a chick like Angelina in the sack back in the day. Then again, Angie is the sexually adventurous type, or used to be anyway—maybe bedding a nonbabe like Billy-B was on her list of tabloid-driving musts?

Sorry, Bills, you're so nottie on ours.