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Mario Lopez

Barry King/WireImage.com

Dear Ted:
Why isn't anyone talking about what a piece of trash Mario Lopez is?
   Julie
   Studio City, Calif.

Dear Mario Hater:
You are.

Dear Ted:
My take on Paris' interest in Benji is that he just might be an entrée to the music world that has never taken her seriously. Any thoughts?
   Catsy
   Providence, R.I.

Dear Sound of Paris:
It’d be one thing if it was John Mayer, but who gives an ef about the Madden bros.’ band besides eyeliner-wearing teens (and, apparently, socialites)? That said, think Jen Aniston is thinking about a music career?