This just in!
Even with the $164 ticket and the endless scrutiny, the Tiger Woods car crash story has been missing something. Namely, it has lacked a Chinese-language animated video illustrating how the whole incident could have played out.
Featuring a slap in the face, a brandished golf club and a collision you can see coming a mile away (unless you're the driver looking back in fear), it's like Avatar with newsy speculation instead of fierce blue creatures.
Unless it's a new videogame, in which case we can't get past the first level.