The Middle-Aged and the Restless

By Ted Casablanca Jun 15, 2007 12:44 PMTags
What comeback TV star was spotted with her boy at an über-swanky Bev Hills doctor’s office? And it seems Linds L. has no problem acting her age, seeing as her 21st rager in Sin City is a go. At least good ol' Bob B. knows when it's time to settle down as his farewell continues, but who oh who shall replace him?
If one were to sit outside 414 North Camden Drive on any given afternoon, one would witness the depth (or lack thereof) and decadence of Hell-Ay culture: the Camden Medical Center, home to world-renowned dentistry, dermatology and, my personal fave, plastic human reconfigurations on the grandest scale.

Actually, I must retract that former statement. Seeing as those damn docs have recently begun using their smarts to renovate the building (in addition to their clients’ bods), including sneaky elevators that bring patients to the underground parking structure where they are immediately whisked away in tinted SUVs, thus concealing their infamous identity, one must venture inside to get a whiff of the good stuff.

Jerome Ware/ZUMAPress.com

Lucky for me, I know enough middle-aged mamas that I can sniff there with relative ease. So, who should my aesthetically unpleased informant see while waiting for her elevator up to the office of plastic surgeon to the stars Dr. Raj Kanodia? Calista Flockhart, dressed in a long-sleeve blue C&C shirt and blue jeans, practically dragging that adorable boy of hers across the foyer toward the elevator.   

Now, I’m not insinuating anything (wouldn’t think of it!). Besides, it’s not like her teeny, tiny frame can hide anything. I’m on the lookout for whiter whites. 

Elsewhere on the body-tortured patrol:
  • Naughty news from the hell-raising heavens above (and below us) that Lindsay Lohan’s 21st B-day bash at Pure is most definitely a go! In addition to the evite available online for your viewing pleasure, Sin City readers report there’s also a huge-ass billboard on Flamingo Road in Sin City, right across the street from the Rio, advertising the shindig. Sniff, sniff...is that trouble I smell? Or just fresh vomit the morning after?
Janet Van Ham/CMT, ark Von Holden/WireImage.com
  • Bob Barker is continuing with his goodbye dos I mentioned yesterday. Now, the search continues to find a replacement host for The Price Is Right, and while I hear it hasn’t been decided just yet who will fill B2’s legendary wing tips, it has been decided who won’t be telling excited tourists to come on down: Mark Steines and Mario Lopez. A boob-tube insider insists to moi that both candidates are out of the running. And apparently, Mario was only auditioned in the first place because he’s friends with the casting director.
  • Here at the Awful Truth, we nominate Debra Messing to take over hosting duties on the hit show! Perhaps her peppy demeanor would help Price audiences recover from the pall of much loved Barker’s departure. Besides, that woman is T-town’s reigning gift-bag slut (do not cross Debbie-doll on her way to confiscate as many of those free babies as she cares to lift at myriad glittering soirees), so shouldn’t it follow that D.M. haul her graft-grabbing bum out for a show that’s all about the merchandise?
Nancy Kaszerman/Zuma Press
  • If things don’t work out in showbiz for Julianna Margulies or Bryant Gumbel, they totally have a future in the hospitality industry, say witnesses who were waited on by the duo at the Project ALS charity dinner at Sapa. Jules and Bryant-babe were arguing over who sold the most wine and champagne for charity that night. Both managed to convince a few deep-pocketed guests to shell out big bucks for pricey bottles of bubbly...all for a good cause, of course!