The Awful Truth

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Dear Ted:
So Megan Fox is trying to go a different route with her image now because "women think she's a slut"? I'm sure her negative image has nothing to do with the fact that the persona she was projecting was so obviously just a calculated ploy to titillate men, like some cheesy sorority girl who makes out with other chicks to get more attention. Now she's trying to sell herself as a homebody? Please. I can understand wanting to keep some things personal, but here's a novel idea: Shut your trap! And stop doing the tacky pictures with the tongue out.
—Bbrey

Dear Foxless:
I don't think she's going as far as being a homebody, but the Fox-er has been less of a trotter lately, keeping more to herself...and guess what...that's OK! We still love her and want to see what media persona she's going to push on us next. Of course, we fully reserve the right to barf all over it, if we so choose.

Dear Ted:
Now I am convinced you have something against Gerard Butler! You never answer any questions regarding him. Are you jealous of him? I just wanted to know if he has been the subject of any B.V.'s since you last absolved him of any sins. November is a long ways from July! Has he any women(an)? Rumors? And don't say: Jen Maniston, Jess or Lindsay, 'cause we know those are all jokes. Anyone real?
—Deanna

Dear No Hatin':
G.B. is not the type to have a steady gal by his side. He wants to settle down about as much as John Mayer does. And please, why would I be jealous of him? He can't even pick up girls, and I don't want to. 

Dear Ted:
Ted, so are Taryn and Robert Pattinson dating on the side, 'cause she made a comment she has seen him more than her family? Which I am hoping is not very much, as you do love your Robsten.
—Arabella

Dear Love Affair:
Don't worry, Taryn and Rob's relaysh is same as with me and R.Pattz, i.e., strictly platonic. Damn. Still, we're both Team Robsten, even if we're both equally insulted Robert didn't as us to take off our clothes. 

Dear Ted:
What is the dirt on Hayden Panettiere? Or is she really as good as she'd like us to believe?
—Luv 

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Dear Ted:
Who does Miley Cyrus think she is these days? First, claiming she's never heard a Jay-Z song and that she doesn't listen to pop music? And now, I've read reports that she is dissing the Twilight series. Based on the quotes it seems like she is going out of her way to alienate her own fan base. What's her deal, and will her fans continue to be loyal if she keeps it up?
—C

Dear Mouthy Miley:
Please, this letter is exactly what she wants! Since not everyone is focusing on all Miley all the time, she needs to stir up some trouble. Leave those kinda comments to Megan Fox; Miles, she does it way better.

Dear Ted:
I was just looking through People's Sexiest Man issue. How many of the drool-worthy guys pictured in that issue are something other than hetero? Adam Lambert is one, so two or three? Four? More than five? Or would it be easier and less litigious for me to ask you which ones are straight as an arrow?
—Sebastiadams

Dear Yummy Edition:
People's (Out) Gayest Men Alive just wouldn't really sell, now would it?

Dear Ted:
What's the deal with Peter Facinelli and Kellan Lutz? Are they just friends or do they have some hidden secrets? Any goss to share on them?
—Kym

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KCSPresse / Splash News

The fact that Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart didn't pose together on the New Moon premiere red carpet—and didn't hang much at the afterparty—rubbed many Twilight fans the wrong way. 

Is big bad Summit putting the kibosh on Robsten? (Again?)

We all know how many suits felt when Rob and Kristen were first getting their flirt on, but from what we've been told, they couldn't care less now.

So what gives? We chatted with New Moon and Twilight producer Bill Bannerman to get the business perspective, and also one of Rob and Kristen's costars...

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ABC photo / Randy Holmes

We've got tons of dish for you from the entire New Moon cast and premiere, but let's get to the really good stuff first—Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart.

The two didn't snap pics together on the carpet, and no one could ask the two stars for any personal bites on each other. But we were able to squeeze some cuteness out of Rob.

Producer Bill Bannerman, by the by, told us Kristen was the Julia Child of the cast. So does Rob like her home cookin', too? And how did the two spend their day off in Madrid?

We've got all this, plus piles o' dish from the afterparty, so you'll def want to read on:

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Stefanie Keenan/Getty Images

Dear Ted:
Was Angie on the mystery diet when she and Brad got together? If so, why would a man want to have a huge family with a less than "healthy" woman? How accurate is the new bio on these two?
—Kesurface

Dear Bust Up Brange:
Yes, Brad very well knew what he was getting into when he ran over to be Jolie's pet.

Dear Ted:
Have Sarah Jessica Parker and hubby Matthew Broderick ever been in one of your blind vices, either together or separately?
—Victoria

Dear Obvious One:
Of course. Innocent, they're not.

Dear Ted:
Who will make it to the altar first: Hayden Christensen, Jensen Ackles or George Eads?
—Fake it

Dear No for Three:
Eads. By default.

Dear Ted:
As everybody else I raved with Robsten's holding hands photo. As you said, in Robsten's terms that was the equivalent to a sex tape. But precisely because of it, can we say that it was an accident? Just a lucky papz in the right place, in the right time? I mean, they're always trying so hard to not appear together like "together" and now this? Or maybe Summit decided to take some advantage? After all, with New Moon's premiere just there, this is sensational, free publicity. Don't misinterpret me, I think it was great, I mean, it was Robsten holding hands!
—Afrodita

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Lester Cohen/Getty Images

Today's the world premiere of New Moon in Los Angeles, and of course, Team Awful will be on hand to give you the delicious run down (live on Twitter!) of the smoldering flirtation going on behind the scenes.

In honor of the big day, we're taking the time to look back in Twilight history. Technically, the Twilight premiere was one year ago tomorrow, but what the hell—take a look at some of our interviews from last year and see how much has changed. Or not at all (you'll love the Nikki Reed tidbit): 

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Fotonoticias/Getty Images

Everyone knows by now that Catherine Hardwicke is crackers. She's got a mouth like Megan Fox, but we still love her, right?

She's always kept it interesting when we've spoken with her, and she certainly didn't disappoint in her recent interview with Time.

Cath says nothing went down between Rob and Kristen during Twilight, but confirms they're giving it a shot now.

Hmmm, you sure about that time line, babe?

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Is John Mayer sick of his womanizing ways? What will Robsten's fate be post-Twilight? All this, plus some delicious Dancing With the Stars scoop in today's high-flying Truth, Lies, & Ted. 

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Suffolk County Police

Dear Ted:
Why is everyone being so hard on Michael Lohan? Obviously leaking those voice mails to the tabloids isn't the best way to go about forcing your daughter to hit rock-bottom, but what else could he do? No other method worked to get her into rehab. Not saying I agree with it 100 percent but hey—leave no stone unturned, right? I say it just may be the push over the edge to get the help she needs. What say you?
—Nichole, Stamford, Conn.

Dear See Your Crazy and Raise You Crazier:
If Michael was really doing it in Lindsay's best interest, sure, I could see your point. But if he really cares he should go over to her house and force the girl into rehab.

Dear Ted:
Was Madonna a subject of a Blind Vice? And do you think Jesus will go Jewish for her?
—Mag

Dear Surprising One:
No, actually, the Queen is exempt. I think Jesus will do whatever the hell she tells him to. He's a sugar baby.

Dear Ted:
I have no doubt in my mind that Robsten is a real couple, and I was loving the hand-holding pics! But their timing for PDA is a little too perfect. I cannot picture Rob or Kristen agreeing to this, but please tell me the paps just got lucky and this was not set up by Summit or one of their reps?
—Sburrow

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KCSPresse / Splash News

We told you the romantic city of Paris might be what Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart needed to get in the mood.

Robsten were just spotted holding hands as they were getting ready to board a private jet at Le Bourget airport tonight leaving France.

This is hardly the first time the two have been caught in public hand-holding, but it is the first time they've been pictured. And seriously, this is like the oldest form of romance if you ask us. Way more meaningful than playing tonsil-hockey in public.

So speak up, Robsten naysayers: Is this good enough for ya?

________

Rob and Kristen so are dating. Peep our other fave Vamp Lovers.

ABC/ Ida Mae Astute

Dear Ted:
I'm a loyal fan, but I can't believe what you wrote in your Rihanna post. Is she brave? Yes. Did she experience something no human or animal should endure? Absolutely. But how on earth can you not point out the timing of this sudden tell-all? It is a transparent PR tactic that her handlers are orchestrating. I am completely offended on behalf of all men, women and children who have experienced abuse. Does the average victim have an opportunity to exploit their ordeal in order to boost record sales and make a couple extra million dollars? No. And please, my darling Ted, spare me the "turning a negative into a positive" angle—Rihanna's handlers should feel ashamed of themselves.
—Helen

Dear I See Your Point:
And of course recognize the blatant timing of it all. But if she influences positively even one woman caught a domestic abuse situation to get out of it by her interview, then that's OK by me.

Dear Ted:
The goings-on with Chris Martin and Josh Duhamel led me to an epiphany. I support gay marriage 100 percent. Why should heteros be the only ones that have to suffer?!
—Bubbley

Dear Random Dots:
I guess...I agree?

Dear Ted:
I'm your No. 1 fan from Greece. As a writer myself, I can't tell you how much I admire your writing style. The way you play with words is just amazing. So my question is this: To me it's obvious that Robsten are an item. Whether you wanna call it friends with benefits, f--k buddies, casual hookups whenever they find some time in their busy schedules, whatever. They are so young, gorgeous, rich, famous, why would they want to commit forever and ever? I understand people's need to see their favorite actors together in real life, but I'm reading comments and questions in your column where people actually want them to get married right now and start producing babies!
—Melina

Dear Not Lost in Translation:
I think it's fans just having fun with it. Rob and Kristen don't let the crazy talk influence them, though.

Dear Ted:
Would a celeb, their PR rep or camp insider (family, friend or hired help) ever post on one of the large message boards with intent to influence public opinion or to spill some dirt anonymously? Let's use Brangie, for example.
—Doubtful

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Jeff Kravitz/Getty Images

Another day, another Robsten non-denial. We're sorry, anti-Twilighters, because the next few weeks are going to be absolute hell for you.

Kristen Stewart chatted with Entertainment Weekly recently in Vancouver and had to attempt to answer the dreaded dating question—again.

"I probably would've answered it if people hadn't made such a big deal about it," K.Stew said. "But I'm not going to give the fiending an answer. I know that people are really funny about 'Well, you chose to be an actor, why don't you just f--king give your whole life away?! Can I have your firstborn child?'"

The most interesting part? How poor Rob tried to put in his two cents but was totally denied!

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