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In between fake breaking up with his girlfriend, posing with fellow infamous pop-culture trainwrecks, befriending rabbis and showing a modicum of self-awareness by promoting mocking himself in viral videos, Jon Gosselin has found time to fight back against TLC.

The former reality TV dad is countersuing the Jon and Kate Plus 8 cable net, answering their widening breach-of-contract suit against him by claiming TLC not only violated child labor laws while filming his octobrood at their Pennsylvania compound, but made him sign a totally unfair contract that severely restricted him from pimping Ed Hardy, making the entertainment news show rounds and doing whatever else it is he does to earn money these days.

Aside from alleging that the network caused him to lose business opportunities and harmed his reputation (we weren't aware he needed help on that last one), Gosselin claims in his $5 million suit that the network has also failed to make good on the promise of some cold, hard cash.

"Jon is going to court with a slingshot and is going to aim it at the eye of the monster, TLC," attorney Mark Heller told E! News.

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Count Dina Lohan among those sickened by this type of behavior.

While Michael Lohan continues his near daily release of embarrassing and hitherto private phone call recordings in a misguided, press-hungry bid to shame his daughter into recovery, Lindsay Lohan's mother is finally speaking out about his despicable tactics.

"The tapes were from a long time ago, and for a father to stoop this low is unforgivable," she tells E! News, before imploring people to consider the source.

"My ex-husband has been in and out of jail for 10 years. My children and I gave him a chance to get to know them again, and he clearly blew that chance!"

We'll say. And while Dina, along with Lindsay and Lindsay's former assistant, are among those threatening legal action against Michael for his leaky ways, she also says that he should never have had the opportunity—or the access—to record phone calls like the one involving Heath Ledger in the first place.

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This is not a good week to be closely associated with Anna Nicole Smith. First, her doctors and onetime lawyer-lover feel the full weight of the legal system. Now comes word that the late model's father, Donald Hogan, has died after a battle with lung cancer.

Hogan's other daughter and Smith's half-sister, Amy Chapman Hogan, told E! News that "he had a lump in his chest that kept giving him a lot of pain. But for some reason the X-rays didn't find it. By the time the doctors diagnosed he was in the last stages of lung cancer."

The 62-year-old, who had long and loudly blamed Howard K. Stern for his daughter's death, refused treatment and spent three weeks in hospice before passing away.

"He just wanted to go home," Hogan said. "We just buried him on Tuesday. It's been a tough week."

Unfortunately, despite repeat attempts, Hogan said her father never got to see his granddaughter Dannielynn before he died. She says the family tried to contact Larry Birkhead several times to set up a meeting to no avail.

As it is, it's not the only event Hogan wishes her father had been able to witness.

As for the handful of new felonies Stern was slapped with yesterday, she said, "Dad would have been really happy about that."

Something tells us he's not the only one.

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Catch up on the ongoing Anna Nicole Smith saga.

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It pays to be Katherine Jackson. Five figures a month, as it turns out.

Court documents filed in connection to Michael Jackson's estate unsealed today show that the King of Pop's mother, and the guardian of his three children, is pocketing a cool $86,204 a month to support her and the kids.

Broken down, $60,000 of the payment has been parsed out specifically for Prince Michael, Paris and Blanket, while the remaining $26,804 is the Jackson matriarch's allowance.

Katherine's portion of the monthly stipend is paying for an assistant, housekeeper, driver, clothing, grooming (it's not the haircuts that add up, it's the trips to Vegas), phone and Internet expenses, insurance costs and various other expenses.

It's unclear how the kids' share of the cash infusion is being spent, though annually, $160,000 will be set aside for entertainment and related expenses, $250,000 for personal needs and roughly $315,000 on hired hands to help care for the minors.

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Michael Lohan is about to go all former commander-in-chief on someone's, well, you know, vowing to track down the "evildoers" responsible for breaking into his daughter's Hollywood home over the weekend.

Here's hoping his mission ends up accomplished.

According to the patriarch, Team Lohan is bringing in some hired hands to discover whose sticky fingers burgled Lindsay Lohan's house. Per Michael, it's not only the second time in three months that LiLo has been burglarized—it's also going to be the last.

"I am coming into town to work with private investigators in order to gather evidence which will be turned over to LAPD and the detectives assigned to the case," Lohan told E! News.

"This time, these evildoers will be caught."

And with Papa Lohan on the case, no one seems to have higher hopes for swift justice than, well, Papa Lohan himself, who apparently is both mad as hell and not gonna take it anymore.

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First Jon Gosselin, now Kari Ann Peniche. Ed Hardy designer Christian Audigier certainly seems to be surrounding himself with the cream of the crap.

Uh, crop. We meant crop.

Peniche, the clothes-averse costar of Eric Dane and Rebecca Gayheart, made her way, as all good tabloid targets do, over to Audigier's studios yesterday, and while she left with the impression that she landed herself a design gig, she may be in for a rude awakening when she turns up for orientation at Ed Hardy HQ tomorrow morning.

A source close to Audigier denied reports of any collaboration with Peniche, a budding swimwear designer, saying "those are just rumors."

Now if only we could track down where they first started…oh, that's right.

"I'm gonna be working on a bikini line," Peniche told paparazzi yesterday. "I start on Friday."

Yeah, that's probably what Gosselin thought, too.

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Peniche's bikini designs will no doubt be a loss to the fashion community. Oh well! Console yourselves with our Beach Bodies gallery.

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Tameka Raymond very well may have been a loyal wife. Just not since last summer.

According to divorce documents filed by Usher on Friday and obtained today by E! News, the couple has been separated since July 2008—meaning that while he is seeking a divorce nearly two years after getting married, he and his estranged missus logged a mere 11 months together as husband and wife (loyal or otherwise) before going their separate ways.

"The marriage between the parties is irretrievably broken," read the documents, filed in Georgia's Fulton County Superior Court.

"There is no reasonable hope of reconciliation."

That's one opinion. Wonder what the detectives apparently hired to trail the singer think…

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Sam Lutfi isn't going down—or away—without a fight.

Just one day after a judge extended Britney Spears' restraining order against her former manager through 2012, Lutfi has filed an appeal challenging the ruling and denying that there is a legal need to keep him 100 feet from the star.

Lutfi's attorney Bryan Freedman told E! News his client is fighting the order because "there was absolutely no evidence whatsoever that Britney Spears was suffering substantial emotional distress as required by the statute.

"In fact, the evidence was just the opposite—it was that she was reaching out for Sam's help, and all Sam did was get her a lawyer. There is no evidence of threats or stalking or anything whatsoever."

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There's some good news being delivered to the Spears family today: Casey Aldridge has been moved out of the intensive care unit at the University of Mississippi Medical Center, where he was transferred Sunday after flipping his truck and sustaining a head injury.

"He is doing good," the recovering 19-year-old's uncle, the Rev. Odus Jackson, told E! News.

"It was a big scare there for a moment, but he got moved out of ICU and is doing good."

Aldridge, Jamie Lynn Spears' fiancé and the baby daddy to 10-month-old daughter Maddie, was driving four friends through rural Tensas Parish, La., in his pickup truck Sunday when, at 1:20 a.m., he lost control of the vehicle.

"I think he cut off the edge of the road, corrected and it flipped," Jackson said.

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Turns out, Britney Spears' upcoming tour is a going to be a kid-friendly one after all. Particularly for her kids.

A week after the pop star's premature proclamation that sons Sean Preston and Jayden James would be joining her for her North American road trip—and less than a week after Kevin Federline's attorney said otherwise—E! News has confirmed that a deal has, at last, been made for the Federtots to join their mother for Circus time.

Federline and Spears have hashed out a custody deal for their road tripping, which will more or less mirror the terms of their current arrangement.

K-Fed attorney Mark Kaplan tells E! that all necessary parties have signed off on the agreement, which will allow Spears to see Sean and Jayden on "pretty much the same schedule that she has now."

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Despite a brief, and quite public, war of words, it seems that all is once again well in the Lohan household. Or at least on its way to being so.

Lindsay Lohan's father, Michael, told E! News he is set to call truce and reunite with his famous daughter and the rest of his offspring at a burial for his father, Richard, who passed away in New York last Thursday after a battle with cancer.

While devastating, the elder Lohan said the passing of his 73-year-old father has brought his family closer together, and while Lindsay was not present for her grandpa's funeral, she will be present for the final service.

"She is going to be at the burial," Lohan told E! News. "All my kids will be there."

And it's not just with his daughter that Lohan has laid down his verbal swords.

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UPDATE: William E. Crockett, the attorney for 220 Laboratories, has issued a statement to E! News defending the claims set forth in their lawsuit against Kate Hudson and her hair-care guru David Babaii.

"We can demonstrate that our client...invented these beauty products," Crockett said. "David Babaii and Kate Hudson have said they invented the product. Claiming to have invented and developed a product that is delivered ready-to-go is not only breach-of-contract—it's fraud.

"In fairness to Ms. Hudson, she may be unaware of the products' history, as she entered into a relationship with WildAid after the products had already been created. We are working to ensure that our client receives the compensation owed them."

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On the positive side, Kate Hudson is finally garnering headlines for something other than her revolving-door love life. On the negative side, it's because she was sued.

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