Holly Madison may no longer be decking the halls of the Playboy Mansion, but, despite wishful thinking, she's not pining away for Hugh Hefner or plotting her revenge on her rap sheet-bearing replacements.
At least, not openly.
"I wanted everyone to know, because I don't like to pretend," she told E! News of her decision earlier this month to come clean about her breakup with Hef. "You know, I wear my heart on my sleeve, and I want everyone to know what I'm thinking."
The erstwhile Girl Next Door also put the kibosh on reports that her ticking biological clock played a part in her split from the octogenarian, saying that while she doesn't hide the fact that she wants kids "someday," right now she's just "way too busy."
She's apparently applying the same rationale to her love life, as well.
While the rumor mill has been consistently buzzing about a possible romance between Madison and unlikely celeb chick magnet Criss Angel, the Playmate is maintaining that the only relationship she has with the Las Vegas illusionist is a platonic one.
"Oh my god, we're friends," she said at Monday night's Bowling for Boobies breast-cancer fundraiser.
"I like him, but we are too busy. We're not, like, dating or anything."
Nor are they likely to anytime soon.
"I'm not looking for a guy right now—I'm in love with myself. Everybody should be in love with themselves."
And while she's clear about the fact that she and Hef are no longer an item, she's not one to kiss—or not kiss, as the case may be—and tell.
"I'm doing really good. I want to let Hef talk about [the breakup] for the next couple weeks...I'm being quiet, but I'm doing really good."
To prove just how good she's doing, Madison is getting ready to take her permanent leave of the Playboy Mansion, particularly with the next generation of girlfriends nipping at her heels.
"Well, I do have my own place," she said. "So I've got a place to go, but, you know, I'm kind of, like, in limbo right now."
She doesn't, however, begrudge her replacements, the arrest-prone Karissa and Kristina Shannon, despite the fact that their recently uncovered checkered past came as quite a surprise.
"Well, I worked with them on their Playmate pictorial and obviously I need to get better at doing my background checks, right?
"You know, we ask on the application, 'Have you ever been arrested or convicted?' and they said no, so I took that at face value, but if Hef doesn't care, than who am I to care, right?"
Sounds like the girl next door has matured into a woman.
"I'm in a more positive place right now," she said, "and I would like to see them do well."
—Additional reporting by Ken Baker