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Fifty Shades of Grey

Today

If the creators of Fifty Shades of Grey were looking for a way to ruin the movie, they just found it: Take away the sex.

And, unfortunately for the people of Vietnam, that's exactly what happened. According to The Independent, Vietnamese censors decided to have their way with the film's content before releasing it to the country's theaters, and the result was the straight up butchering of everything that was worth watching. Because, seriously, is anyone going to see Fifty Shades for anything besides the sex scenes?

The saddest part about this for all of the country's moviegoers is that the release itself was a big surprise. Ladies all over Vietnam were simply giddy at the news that Christian and Anastasia would be coming to them, only to leave the theater in complete disappointment. Censors cut out about 20 minutes of sexy time, reportedly leaving only a few kisses. Naturally, people are peeved.

"It's totally ridiculous," said duped audience member Xuan Thao to the paper. "This version is rated 16-plus, but it doesn't need an age restriction; a five-year-old could watch it. Even the trailer was sexier."

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She wasn't alone in her outrage—crowds have been shouting and jeering at the screen at each obvious cut. And the censorship made for some very confusing plot twists, with audience members left none the wiser about fights the couple had, or even why the ending of the movie happened as such. 

Considering the country's conservative culture, it's actually a big step forward for Fifty Shades to have hit theaters at all. But as Thao pointed out, "They would have been better banning it all together." And she makes a great point.

When you take out the naughty business in the red room and the trysts at the piano, you're basically left with a bunch of contract negotiations. So, the people of Vietnam are paying $15 to watch a business meeting. They deserve better.