Wagoner Police DepartmentDisclaimer: We support any person who hates pants so much they leave the house without wearing them. We wish we could be that person. After all, no pants are the best kind of pants.
Best back to school day ever? The police certainly don't think so, but what do they know?!
Lorie Hill was a new hire at Wagoner High School in Oklahoma, and she showed up to the first day of classes focused, prepared and ready to mold the young minds of tomorrow.
Just kidding, she showed up drunk and pantless.
Lorie was found by two other teachers in a empty classroom obviously intoxicated and sans pants. Cops arrived to arrest her and she admitted that she had been drinking, but there was only enough evidence for a public intoxication arrest. Wagoner Police Chief Bob Haley told Fox 23 that there were no credible witnesses to prove she drove while under the influence, but if she left the house completely unaware of the breeze wafting over her exposed nether regions, it's safe to assume she wasn't thinking that clearly before she got to the school.
The school hasn't released a statement regarding Lorie's punishment, though we can't help but feel a little bit sorry for her. Teenagers today are pretty terrible, and we might turn to booze if we knew we were about to face a classroom full of kids. Obviously what she did was very unsafe and stupid, but maybe she wasn't done with her summer vacation? Because sitting around drinking without pants is definitely a (glorious) time off kind of situation.
But Lorie was courageous enough to bring her vacation actions into the real world. And on her first day at a new job, no less! Bold, bold strategy.
Or maybe this was all a ploy to get in good with the students as the "cool" teacher. The wait list to be in her homeroom is probably insane, because if your teacher is too out of it to pay attention to you during the first period of the day, it's nap city and you are the mayor.