"Sexist" Gorilla Removed From Dallas Zoo, Baboon "Cops a Feel" on a Reporter Live on Air

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by John Boone | Wed., Sep. 25, 2013 10:09 AM

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To quote Gwen Stefani, this s--t is ~~bananas~~ misogynistic. M-I-S-O-G-Y-N-I-S-T-I-C.

Patrick, a 23-year-old, 430-pound Western lowland gorilla, has been given a notice of eviction from the Dallas Zoo after displaying a "sexist" attitude towards the zoo's female gorillas.

Patrick, who is a "staff favorite," according to the Dallas News, got along well with humans, but would constantly nip and sneer at the female gorillas he was intended to mate with, even biting one female.

Patrick, who was born at the Bronx Zoo in 1990 where he was abandoned by his mother, will be transferred to Riverbanks Zoo and Gardens in Columbia, S.C., a resort better suited to handling his behavioral issues.

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"It's become clear that he prefers to live a solitary life," Dr. Lynn Kramer told ABC.

"This move will allow Patrick to continue to thrive," she explained. Dallas spokeswoman Laurie Holloway continued, "He's beautiful and smart and everyone loves him. We're really sad to see him go."

Meanwhile, elsewhere in the world, another primate was rubbing the fairer sex the wrong way. And when we say "rubbing," we mean literally. Watch, as Mickey the baboon cops a feel on this Fox 40 field reporter:

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The local news affiliate explains, "While doing a live shot to preview the Lodi Grape Festival, Sabrina Rodriguez welcomed Mickey the baboon. Well, Mickey got a little handsy while Sabrina was teasing her upcoming report."

And if Mickey's huge grin is any indication, he was pretty proud of himself too.

"We'll learn more about why baboons actually love grapes," Rodriguez teases in the clip. What the world suddenly wanted to know, though, is why baboons actually love boobs.

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