Is Paris Hilton finally getting her hoity-toity toosh dethroned?
America's love-her-or-hate-her heiress hit the boob tubes again last week with her latest foray into reality television, The World According to Paris, (lovingly nicknamed by many as TWAT P) and the rating were not-so-great.
In fact, they were horrible.
Which begs the Q: Is Paris Hilton finally irrelevant? And our answer: Not if she has anything to do with it. If we know P. (and we do, Vice and all) then we bet our Prada purses that she's not ditching the limelight without a fight.
So we thought up some very posh ways the princess can get back on track:
1. Makeover Madness! First, might we suggest a makeover...or more appropriately, a make-under. It's time to quit with the caked on makeup, ditch the fakey color contacts, and rip out those awful extensions (before some psycho social climber does it for ya).
And may we also suggest going—gasp—brunette? Radical, we know.
2. Another Night in Paris! Reese Witherspoon may bitch that you don't need a sex tape to make it big in this biz, but it certainly hasn't hurt some partic people either! Maybe it's time for a sequel to 1 Night in Paris, with a bigger budget and less night-vision (it totally kills the mood).
At least then Par can go on Piers Morgan again and earn some pity points by crying herself, instead of leaving the water works to her worked-over mama.
3. Paris for President! Why shouldn't P.H. run for public office? We're sure Paris could spice up those boring public access meetings. And it's not like everyone in office, or seeking it, doesn't already have a sex scandal.
We're not even suggesting a title as high profile as governor—but who knows? Apparently the best way to nab a prestigious government gig is a reality show. Just ask Sarah Palin.
4. Adopt a Third-World Baby! Babies-in-need are so the new Chihuahuas, right, Paris?
Look at the cuties Brangelina nabbed from around the world and the press they picked up from their parental prowess. Maybe that whole mama-drama thing can convince the public that P.H. is cares about more things than which club has the best bottle service.
5. Take the Nicole Richie Route! Old pal Nicole Richie has proven that it is possible to press the restart button. Paris's sometimes bestie (and former reality TV cohort) ditched her eating disorder and drug addiction to become a wife, mother of two, cocreator of a children's foundation and successful fashionista.
We'd hate for Paris to become just another Hollywood has-been, so which method to fame madness do you think she should pick?