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Charlie Sheen Back on TV With Porn Stars, Murder and, um, Drew Carey

Charlie Sheen, Law and Order Criminal Intent GSI Media; Jeff Lipsky/USA Network

Ripped from the headlines—the seemingly millions of them—comes the Charlie Sheen story. No, it's not an afterschool special warning of the perils of drugs and porn stars, it's the actor's real-life hijincks being hijacked for Law & Order: Criminal Intent.

And then there's Drew Carey...

MORE: Listen to Charlie's crazy 911 call

Drew Carey, Charlie Sheen GSN

First, let's go over the details of Criminal Intent.

The upcoming eipsode of the show, now in its 10th and final season, will feature a thinly veiled Sheen-esque character. The fictionalized Charlie will, instead of being an actor, be a rock-star fashion designer who is wildly unraveling in public. The incredibly successful character is a hit professionally, with everything he designs turning into a hit, but behnid the scenes, he's losing it. Sounds familiar?

The designer has a passion for cocaine benders and hooker visits, per Deadline.com. Jay Mohr has been tapped to play the part.

Since the USA Network show is a crime drama, there has to be a crime, preferably a murder. So, producers have spun the plot of this episode around a party at Sheen's—sorry Nyle Brite's—house, where a guest turns up dead.

No word yet on a airdate, but the new season kicks off May 1.

In the meantime, the Vatican Assassin Warlock himself will make a flesh-and-Adonis-blood appearance April 12 on Drew Carey's Improv-A-Ganza show airing on the Game Show Network.

Back in January, Sheen joined the show's cast live on stage for a performance at the MGM Grand Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas. In the skit, Sheen separates the men from "the trolls"  and is helped along by comics Ryan Stiles and Greg Proops.

And for those keeping track at home, it's only three days until Sheen's own live Violent Torpedo of Truth show kicks off.

Consider yourselves warned.

CLOWNING CHARLIE: Check out Dr. Joel McHale's diagnosis!

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