Just when you thought Dancing With the Stars had no more surprises up its frilly, multicolored sleeves...
Not only was Chuck Liddell's zombie-town samba with Anna Trebunskaya the routine the judges chose to kick off elimination night—not the most pleasing dance to look at, but still worthy of another round of applause—but Tom DeLay and his fractured feet were the first to be declared safe!
But if you were following your reality-TV news today, you already knew the ex-congressman was planning to drop out of the competition due to the severity of his injuries.
So being called first was really just a little dramatic salt in the ol' wound there.
"You can't practice, and if you can't practice you make a fool out of yourself out there, and I don't want to do that to Cheryl," explained DeLay when Tom Bergeron inquired about his future on the show.
An invitation has been extended to the Hammer to come back and dance the Texas two-step (which he would have had to perform next week) on the season finale if he's feeling better in time.
Also taking a mere consolation turn on the finale will be Debi Mazar, who had healthy feet but ultimately couldn't do much with them.
"Well, I definitely know a few more steps and I've had a great time," the actress said. "I've loved every moment of it…I loved my time with Maks."
Her moment in the DWTS spotlight ended after Bergeron abruptly asked her the real pronunciation of her last name. (Technically it's "Mah-zar," but she's gotten used to hearing herself called "May-zer."
The former tween popster had to sweat it out during quadruple jeopardy, however, as he, Joanna Krupa and Michael Irvin were all dangled over the fire before being returned to safety, one by one.
Also among the entertainments tonight were performances by Queen Latifah and an invigorating Broadway/B-boy routine by inaugural America's Best Dance Crew champ JabbaWockeeZ.
The 11 remaining stars perform again next Monday.
Check out the celebs behind the scenes in our Dancing With the Stars rehearsal gallery.