The girl is his? Not so fast.
Despite being quoted in the ever-reliable News of the World seemingly professing to be the biological father of Michael Jackson's daughter, Paris, former child star Mark Lester isn't trying to cash in his ticket for the paternity lotto just yet.
"I'm sure, as far as I know, [the children] were all his," Lester, who starred as the titular Oliver! in the Oscar-winning musical, told E! News.
"I expected lots of different things to come out, but this is extraordinary."
Even more extraordinary? What Lester actually did, uh, deposit as fact to the British tabloid.
The 51-year-old U.K.-based Lester is godfather to Paris, Prince Michael and Blanket and has been close friends with Jackson for nearly 30 years, even spending Christmas at Neverland Ranch back in 2003.
And while he denied fathering the Jackson kids, he did admit that he once complied with Jackson's request to donate sperm to the pop star.
"It's been a secret for so long," said Lester, who is currently biding his time as an osteopath and acupuncture specialist. "In 1996 Michael asked me if I would give him my sperm and I said yes.
"It was a gift to him, no money was paid, it was something I was honored to do. He wanted children so badly."
But while the News of the World apparently made the jump from sperm donation on its own, Lester told the tab it's possible his "gift" to Jackson could have been put to use and was willing to take a paternity test to prove—or, as it were, disprove—the theory.
As for the Jackson three, while Lester told the British tabloid on camera that he can see "strong similarities" between his own 15-year-old daughter and Paris, he told E! News not long ago that the only person the trio shared an uncanny resemblance with was their father.
"Paris is very pale and Prince has Michael's eyes," he said. "And certainly Blanket is facially very similar to Michael. I'm really amazed to hear that."
Imagine how amazed he must have been when he said it.
Meanwhile, Lester isn't the only one boarding the biological bandwagon. According to TMZ, a woman named Claire Elisabeth Fields Cruise has filed three guardianship papers not only alleging that she's the mother of all three Jackson kids, but that she's engaged to Prince Michael's biological father.
And as for the Cruise part of her name, that's not a coincidence, either—she's previously claimed to be the mother of one of Tom Cruise's kids.
As for the O.G. alleged Jackson baby mama, Billie Jean Jackson, she appeared in court this morning for the ongoing estate hearing in the King of Pop's case, ostensibly to make a play for custody of the kids.
At least there's no disputing the celebs in our Hollywood's Hottest Dads gallery.