So, this happened.
Last night, Joe Jackson was back where he's most comfortable—in the glare of the media spotlight—and after touching on the requisite talking points of drug addiction and potential foul play in his son's death, he dropped a bombshell and a half on Larry King Live.
During the interview, Jackson was twice asked about allegations—proffered in great detail by Michael himself—that he physically abused his children, and while he brushed off the first question by claiming any such reports are "a bunch of bull s," he was not quite as succinct the second time around.
What started off as a denial quickly and bizarrely morphed into a claim that he "didn't make no mistakes" at all as a parent and ended, after brief asides into parental spanking and since-passed neighborhood kids, as a passionate if incomplete rant on the history of slavery in America.
On the bright side, at least he didn't try to shoehorn in a plug for his new record label this time.
For those who prefer your nostalgia unfettered by scandal, relive the good times in our Michael Jackson: A Life gallery.