Morning Piss: Pattinson Pretenders

Twilight hotheads who know nothing about cast pretend they know it all

By Ted Casablanca Apr 02, 2009 11:15 AMTags
Robert PattinsonJun Sato/Getty Images

Fact: Rob Pattinson isn't overly fond of cleaning things, including himself. Fact: We'd all happily do him, anyway (I'm a fairly recent convert, as I at first found R.P. a bit girlie for my tastes). Fact: Twilight fans are as rabidly determined to gush over things on the set of Twilight about which they sometimes know very little. Fact: Much lovelorn shenanigans are going down on the Twilight franchise (and have been since the first installment began filming), as my last Blind Vice revealed.

Fact: In discussing the latter, incensed Twi-Twits really are outdoing themselves as lionandthelamb24 (and I thought Ted Casablanca was a bad moniker!) spewed in her comment: "Ted is trying to get hits on his site and will make up anything related to Twilight to get them…Ted uses the word Twyla Babe-Sucker...means whoever the girl is plays a vampire but the thing is Kristen doesn't play one right now, its not Nikki Reed, it's not the girl who plays Heidi, its not Dakota Fanning, and Ashley Greene is single so I mean...He's just making **** up once again."

Love how Missy (Mister?) L has it all figured out. Too bad, 'cause if she just got off her hotheaded little throne there, she'd see that the incredibly true answer was right in front of her all along!