Did Ryan Murphy script the last 15 minutes of this Real Housewives of Orange County episode or what?
After a fairly innocuous episode that saw Meghan King Edmonds and Kelly Dodd approaching strangers passing by on the street like people looking for signatures on a petition, only to inquire about their genealogy as a part of Meghan's quest to meet an ancestor at random, and the rest of the gang screamed their way through a milking lesson at a dairy farm, this already bleak trip overseas got darker than we could've ever imagined. And because none of it was caught on camera, we only heard the story through some intense narration that wouldn't have felt out of place on this season of American Horror Story: Roanoke.
After Shannon Beador and Heather Dubrow seemed oddly interested in making sure Kelly always had a drink in hand, despite her repeated attempts to refrain from drinking on their last night in town, Kelly grew suspicious of their motives, even muttering to herself about an "ambush" at dinner. Her paranoia was in high gear. And that's when everything went haywire. Without any footage to give us the full picture, here's the story as told by the women in their interviews.
Kelly and Vicki Gunvalson went to Tamra Judge's room after hoping she'd join them for a drink. Tamra refused to even open the door. Per Kelly's account, Shannon then came running down the hall, yelling at her. According to Shannon, she merely asked her a question "matter-of-factly."
After Kelly retreated to bed, Heather, Shannon, and Tamra decided they were in the mood to party after all and hit up the pub in the hotel. After begging Vicki to join them, Kelly's supposed ally did just that and supposedly told Tamra all the trash Kelly was saying behind her back. Wanting to get back at Kelly, she sent her a selfie she'd snapped with Vicki, revealing that her "friend" had told all. Kelly lost it, confronting the group in the hallway. Depending on who's telling the story, she was either on an angry rampage (Shannon's version) or simply confused and in tears (what the sneaky footage shot on Heather's cell phone seemed to show).
At this point, it was 3:20 in the morning and time for the women to head to the airport. Things did not calm down. Kelly told Shannon she needed to shave all the hair off her chin. Heather told Kelly she was insane, trash, and probably having a psychotic break. And Vicki, well, Vicki kept her mouth shut. It was ugly. And it's far from over. This long Irish night from hell continues next week. Stay tuned.
What did you think about everyone's version of events? Whose do you think is closest to the truth? Sound off in the comments below!
The Real Housewives of Orange County airs Mondays at 9 p.m. on Bravo.
(E! and Bravo are both part of the NBCUniversal family.)