Stop feeling bad!
We understand that Jersey Shore is super addictive, so no one's judging you for being so interested in what happened during tonight's episode.
And as always, it's a doozy.
Mike's plan to shut down Snooki by having his boy The Unit tell Jionni all about Situation and Snooks' alleged sexcapade failed because Unit was in Miami. Oh well…
JWoww was still super annoyed that her boyfriend Roger was dodging her phone calls and wouldn't hang out with her even though he was down the street with his buddies at the boardwalk. She even ditched Aztec (or "The Sweat Box," as Vinny liked to call it) early because of her funk.
Speaking of Vin, he managed to score double-time at the club. First he found a girl (Deanna) that was ready to leave with him, but once he turned around, there was a different "hotass chick" (Nicki) standing there (with a guy but it was her brother). So what did he do?
Deena distracted Deanna—and also told that the hotter girl was Vinny's longtime friend—while Vin took shots and danced with Nicki. What a wingwoman!
Turned out Nicki is a lesbian, but Vinny didn't let that stop him. He was determined to try and turn her straight (you gotta give the guy some credit for being so hopeful and persistent. And crazy). But once everyone got back to the house, the "lez-be-honest" left. Nice try, Vin.
The next morning, Jenni finally got ahold of Roger, who explained that he didn't have a phone and that's why he took the day off. She wasn't having it. But unlike her usual confrontational self, she just hung up. Don't worry, we revisit this situation later.
Meanwhile, Snooki complained about sunlight and shared with us that it's always dark in Arkansas (yes, she meant Alaska), and Vinny told us that his smush with the backup girl was average. Thanks for letting us know.
JWoww vs. Roger, round two: Her beau called to let Jenni know that he would be an hour late for their date, which they ultimately canceled, and JWoww ripped him a new one. What'd he have to say back? The poor guy didn't even have a chance. Click!
Snooki and Deena got in trouble at work for leaving the Shore Store while still on the clock (wonder why that would get Danny mad?) and Pauly D introduced us to his "stalker"—no, not Danielle from previous seasons. A new one, and she wore the same outfit every day. Creeeeeepy.
Pauly kept telling us "I'm scared," especially later that night, when he saw her following him on the boardwalk. And whaddya know? There she was at the pool tables, too! Thanks to his good friend Vinny, Pauly was introduced to her (Vanessa). Probably not going to help getting rid of her, but whatever works.
In a turn of events, Sitch went out for a drink with Deena and Snooki. Yes, Snooki, the girl who's life he's trying to ruin. Makes perfect sense.
The next day, Deena called her Danny to apologize for her and Snooks' shenanigans. He wasn't very accepting of their apology, but hopefully with time he will be, because if these two get fired, they'll have to leave the house.
We also found out that Deena and Sitch might become family! Well, probably not, but D's sister was dating his brother, Frank. Imagine Mike being your brother-in-law…stop crying! It wouldn't be that bad. We don't think.
JWoww vs. Roger, round three: After Pauly and Vinny told Jenni that they saw Roger at the gym, and he explained how he won't kiss her you-know-what after acting the way she did on the phone, she called her boo and apologized. But he was still pretty heated. The call (and episode) ended with an ultimatum…
"So what's it going to be?"
Yikes! What do you think will happen? Sound off in the comments!