Overdone, Overpriced

You will not believe some of the fancy-derriere doings Tyra Banks is up to in New Yawk, plus, who’s surprisingly ‘n’ supposedly paying the big-time bill! Also, Katie appears to be AWOL while Britney’s better senses seem to have taken leave, too—ready to goss like a no-good nutcase? Good!

Hurricane Tyra blew into New Yawk last week to shop for the perfect new pad. You remember, ‘course, that it was we AT tattlers who first told you about the real reason Tyra was movin’ her luscious ‘n’ ample bum, not to mention the entire production assortment on her talk show (which teaches us how to use a public restroom properly, among other terribly important things): It was for a boyfriend. Ugh. How sappy.

Yep, Tyra-hon is apparently so enamored by her man-candy that she just had to live in the same city as him...even if it costs tons of Angelenos their Tyra jobs.

Scuttlebutt gab is that the man is John Utendahl, an investment banker on Wall Street. He’s tall (6’3", to be exact, so Tyra can wear her Manolos without fear of towering over him, so unlike Kate Cruise), dark and handsome. He’s cute, but dating an i-banker from New Yawk is so friggin’ cliché, isn’t it? I prefer the Hell-Ay stereotype of falling in love with an actor, myself.

All that man-mush tawk aside, we hear Tyra’s sniffing out digs at the Setai New York. She apparently made an appointment at the posh ‘n’ pricey locale under a fake name (Panties Forward, perhaps?) and came in with huge-ass shades and a floppy hat to check out the Wall Street building. How apropos!

Now, if Tyra-hon does, indeed, decide to move into said swank spot, she gets access to the members-only Setai club, spa and restaurant. Too much elitist entrée for my In-N-Out tastes, but whatev floats the America’s Next Top Model mama’s hoochie, ya know? Translation: Hate Tyra, love Model, so we’ll forgive all, n'est-ce pas?

Just In P.S.: My Desk Tyra tells me the assumed name Ms. B used was June Blancher. Is that because T seems to be getting whiter and whiter? Also, DT whispers to yours truly that they're hearing T's production company will be purchasing the pad, which, at last preliminary point, looks to be two apartments (which T.B. wants to combine) not one. Oh, and homes at the Setai range between 1 and 7 million buckers. Each. Nice friggin' pro perk there, Tyra-sweetie!

“There’s even more that happened that isn’t in there.”

The above quote is from an insider who was present on set of that now-infamous OK! shoot with Britney Spears. Apparently, even more bizarro stuff happened that day which didn’t make the accompanying article’s final cut. Moolah word also, as we mentioned before, is that Ms. Es got absolutely nada for her short sit-down and photo session, except the clothes she reportedly walked out with, 'course.

A mere four test pictures were taken that the mag didn’t run because they were “poor quality.” Hmmm, either that or they might actually have to cough up that big paycheck if they did run any of the shots? Brit apparently only talked for about 15 minutes before ditching out on the interview, but she was “really sweet.” So am I, babe-poos, if somebody’s stuffin’ fried chicken down my gullet at the same time! (Beats the booze 'n' stuff.) Like, duh...

Guess Beyoncé really doesn’t want us to see her fall on her bootylicious bum. After she face-planted on the stairs while performing “Ring the Alarm” at an Orlando concert last week, she asked the audience not to put it on YouTube. Natch, videos of the tumble quickly popped up all over the Internet and became a must-click item. Not anymore.

As I’m sure you know (but just wanted to make sure ya did!), when you try to watch the videos of the nasty debacle on YouTube, the too-fun viewing station states the clips have been removed “due to a copyright claim by Sony BMG.” Did Beyoncé really sic her record label on YouTube and demand the footage of the fall be removed? Hey, B-hon, here’s a hint: Let folks see it—it actually made us like you more for showing you’re not perfect and you trip and fall (and hopefully fart) and make stink-ola mistakes like the rest of us human beings.

Also, as I’m sure you’ve heard, Rumer Willis was involved in some naughty police ac-shun last Thursday when she was hanging in a Maryland La Quinta Inn after filming From Within that day. Apparently, the coppers came in and hauled out one of her companions for marijuana possession. For the record, Demi and Bruce’s darling daughter wasn’t detained or questioned, but this reminds us of a little something Rumer told us at the BlackBerry party a bit ago:

“I don’t worry about the underage drinking, because I don’t drink. And I know everyone says that, but I actually don’t.” Hmmm. Now we’re starting to understand why you don’t worry about underage drinking …

Oh, and back at that Designcare fundraiser I mentioned last week. Forgot to add that Oprah’s fave homegirl, Gayle King, was there, sans the reportedly icy O, natch.

“She’s been away,” G.K. gabbed, when we asked where the absent TV legend happened to be. And as for a possible summery rendezvous with the two BFFs being in the works, no such gal-pallin’ luck there either, I must report. “We don’t have anything planned. She’s relaxing and chilling in Hawaii, and I’m still working!”

What a bitch. Yo, Oprah-hon! Gayle and I want tickets to that primo pad you’ve got in Maui I was tellin’ everybody ‘bout a few months ago. And we want first class, not coach, like Stedman gets, hear?