Lindsay Lohan, Samantha Ronson

CAD/Fame Pictures

We're certain by now you've snooped onto Lindsay Lohan's MySpace blogiary and saw her sweet-nothing shout-out to her blecher half: the oh-so-coy "ILY" ("I Love You", for those three of you out there who couldn't figure that one out). Why hold back and just type out the initials, Lo-hon? And why bother playing this is-she-gay-or-what game anymore?

LiLo should just reveal her lady relaysh to one lucky tabloid already. They'll make oodles of money off exploiting her not-so-private life, but so will she—one brief interview and an official quickie photo shoot with Linds and her SamRo sweetie in a lip-lock, and babe will make back any debt she'll have for the next five years. She won't have to worry about makin' movies anymore, either, since she's made a better living just walking around from one posh Hell-Ay hang to the next.

L2's recent ladylike behavior is a ringing endorsement for homosexuality, ain't it? "Be Gay and Clean Up Your Life" sounds like a much more moralistic lifestyle than heter-hos like Sienna Miller slinking around town with a married man, no? And just look what coming out (and proud, don't forget) did to Lance Bass' and Neil Patrick Harris' careers! Yours definitely needs a reboot, babe.

Additional English-screwin' reporting by Becky Bain

  • Share
  • Tweet
  • Share

We and our partners use cookies on this site to improve our service, perform analytics, personalize advertising, measure advertising performance, and remember website preferences. By using the site, you consent to these cookies. For more information on cookies including how to manage your consent visit our Cookie Policy.