Shannen Doherty, Us Weekly

Shannen Doherty is Hollywood's original bad girl, but you wouldn't know it from the press she's doing lately—especially the latest Us Weekly cover story in which the actress insists she's found an "inner peace" and refuses to comment on her turbulent relationships with her former 90210 castmates.

This is not the exposé we Doherty devotees expected. Seriously, not even a tiny spat with her reunited costar, Jennie Garth? Au contraire, says the "grown up and evolved" Shannenbot.

What is going on? In her day, ShanDo put the antics of Young Hollywood to shame...

LiLo's DUI and set tardiness? Check. Quickie marriage à la Britney? Two of 'em. Paris' romp with Rick Salomon? Uh-huh. (See previous: At least Shannen Salomon got annulled.) Miley's racy magazine photos? LOL—try three issues of Playboy.

We're still waiting for some young starlet to attempt Shannen's assault with a deadly weapon. But still our girl insists on having class: "I certainly wasn't showing my crotch."

Surely a reminder (courtesy of a colorful pull-quote in the Us spread) of Garth's 1995 comments will spark our spitfire: "There are times when I think she may be tragic. I think there may be something evil inside her."

Get off the Beverly Hills High road, Doherty—it's time for a 9021-oh-no-she-di'n't smackdown. We're counting on you to bring bitchy back.

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