Andrew MacPherson/Fox

Hey peeps! This is it. The last blasted—er, I mean, amazing and wonderful network upfront presentation of 2007. Wheeeee.

I've had about five minutes of sleep in the past five days, so my thumbs are a bit sluggish, but oohhh!! Kiefer! Mary Lynn Rajskub! David Boreanaz! Okay, I'm awake and ready to Berry the deets to you live from Fox's big fall schedule reveal at City Center in NYC.


We're getting a parade of stars on the stage...all the new shows (Lauren Ambrose, Parker Posey, Kelsey Grammer, Patricia Heaton, Julianna Margulies), the Bones cast, the House cast (hey, Lisa Edelstein chopped off all her hair!), etc.

And...buzzkill. Marketing guy talking sports. Hmph.

While we're waiting, a funny story: Went to the Maxim party at the Gansevoort last night, which was so hot and so packed with celebs and partygoers, I, um, got a nosebleed. My first nosebleed, in fact, since the Will Arnett debacle of '06 (which many of you will remember). And I dookie you not, not 20 minutes later, I ran into Will Freaking Arnett! For the first time since the nosebleed debacle of '06! Coincidence? I think not! Will and I chatted, and on behalf of the fans, I told him to get back inside that TV set—stat. He said he'd work on it. I heart him. So much it bursts blood vessels, apparently.

Back to City Center:

Peter Liguori's looking good (he is the dreamiest network head) and tells us House gets this year's post-Super Bowl slot. Me likey.

Liguori admits fault with last season, saying, "In hindsight, we picked shows that we thought could be packaged into commercial success. This year we are picking up the series that we love."

Now for the sneak peeks of the new shows: 

Back to You:  This new comedy with Kelsey Grammer, Patricia Heaton and Fred Willard is from the producers of Frasier. Looks pretty good. I mean, can you really go wrong with that cast? Still, from the promo, could be a bit too similar to Will Ferrell's Anchorman (in present day).

The Return of Jezebel James:  This is a new drama from Gilmore Girls producer Amy Sherman-Palladino. Wait a minute—is that a laugh track I hear? Whaaat? Amy S.-P. with a laugh track? Okay, that threw me a little, but still, Amy writing for Lauren Ambrose and Parker Posey is pretty much perfect, and the show looks funny, smart, endearing and full of warm fuzzies. Totally up my alley.

The Rules for Starting Over:  Karen! This is the Farrelly brothers comedy starring Rashida Jones. Pretty much a montage of dating horror stories that are totally silly (did I mention the Farrellyness of it?), but you can't help but laugh—and the room is actually bursting out laughing as the monkey and leprechaun jokes fly. I'll probably watch every episode and never admit it.

Nashville:  This is a reality-drama from the Laguna Beach peeps about aspiring country songsters. Hot damn. Not my thing. Sorry, y'all.

K-Ville:  Drama about two cops living in New Orleans dealing with the aftermath of Katrina. Anthony Anderson, Cole Hauser. I'm sleepy. This show is not helping.

New Amsterdam:  About a hot old dude. Meow. He's actually 400 years old thanks to a curse/blessing that dictates he cannot die until he "reunites with his one true love." Looks decent, but a little blah.

Canterbury's Law:  Julianna Margulies asked three and a half hours' worth of questions before taking the role, Liguori tells us. Very picky—and she picked this one, so it must be good, right? J.M. plays a defense attorney who's ballsy and tough, and this show is "hard-hitting," the promo tells us, as a witness punches her in the face. Could be good.

The Sarah Connor Chronicles:  This one stars Claire's friend Zach from Heroes (looking totally different and dark-haired and badass), and the bad guy is Owain Yeoman (aka Hottie McHotPants from The Nine, Kitchen Confidential) and a newcomer as Sarah. Action-packed but looks risky. I'm not totally sold.

And. It's. Over. I'm. So. Glad. Need. Bed. Now. (Wentworth's or Kiefer's will do.)

Thanks so much for hanging out with me this week and putting up with the nonsensical ramblings of my thumbs on this completely worn-out Crackberry. It Or something like it? Maybe?

I'll share much more with you when I get back on the West Side (and hopefully, refuel my brain), but for now I'm off to mourn Veronica Mars and catch some z's. Good night!

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