Scrubs, Zach Braff, Blue Man Group

Paul Drinkwater/NBC

Someone’s gay. Someone’s dead. And everyone will be singing—well, everyone except Sarah Chalke. That’s what I can tell you about the new season of Scrubs, which finally starts Nov. 30 on NBC! There is much, much, much to celebrate—like, oh, I don’t know, the return of the best dang comedy around. Which, from the sounds of it, will be having its best season ever. And as you can tell from the photo at right (with the Blue Man Group guest starring in the season premiere), it's also a season of which Tobias Fünke would be proud.

After hobnobbing with (and bowing down to) the Scrubs cast and crew at a recent sixth-season launch party for the show, here’s what I can tell you about what's ahead—and all the reasons you should set your DVR now.

The Grim Reaper Checks In: The time has come to say farewell to...someone. When sources told me that someone was dying on Scrubs this season, I thought it was perhaps intended to counterbalance the baby boom. But that’s not the plan, according to creator/mad genius Bill Lawrence. "Circle of life?" he cracked. "We should do that thing with The Lion King and holding the kid up—nah. [We] don’t want to be the type of show that has people in high school when they are 40. We try and make things move along. We’re going to kill someone, and I haven’t told him or her yet, so it's mortifying to me." Aw, jeepers, Bill. I asked John C. McGinley about the death rumor, and he said he'd just heard the same thing at work. McGinley believes it's someone "out of left field." My guess? Nurse Laverne. "That's not who I heard," he said. Sigh. No matter who it is, this is gonna suck!

Once More, with Feeling: Episode six is the much-vaunted Scrubs musical episode, written by the composers of Broadway's Avenue Q. I'm told it's more like an opera than a musical, because there are no spoken words and the whole story is advanced through singing. Ted's barbershop quartet makes an appearance, and Neil Flynn says that the Janitor crashes the party. As for the leads, Zach Braff reports, "Donald and Judy, I would say, are the best singers. They could genuinely be on Broadway—they have beautiful voices. Sarah Chalke..." Sucks? "She can break windows."

Happy Thanksgiving: The Turkey or Turkette has arrived! "We filmed having the baby," says Donald Faison. Sam Lloyd, who plays forever-despondent lawyer Ted (a nephew of Christopher Lloyd, by the way—who knew?!), says his character was allowed near the sprog, but only after proving his manual dexterity to surgeon Turk. "I held the baby once, and I poked it another time," says Lloyd. "Turk allowed me to hold the baby, because I have good hands. It was a hand-eye coordination thing. He threw a ball at me, as hard as he could, and I caught it, so he said, 'Okay, you can hold it.' "

Double Trouble? Dr. Cox's baby—or babies, as the case may be—is still with the stork. See, because I'm 12 kinds of trouble, I conceived a little rumor of my own and suggested to McGinley that Jordan is having twins. "Omigod, I don't know! That would be great! I asked the writers if my child—one of them, if it is twins (I don't know if it is twins)—I asked if I could have a kid with special needs, so we could address some stuff." McGinley, whose son Max was born with Down syndrome, is a spokesperson for the National Down Syndrome Society and actively supports their annual Buddy Walks. McGinley (who is as hilarious and awesome in person as he is on TV) finally determined, "I don't think it'll be twins, and I'll tell you why: because it's so hard to shoot kids on the set." Ah yes, all those silly laws preventing child exploitation. Dang. Foiled again.

Zach Braff Believes in a Thing Called Love: I asked Zach about J.D.'s love life and his prospects for happily ever after, and he said, "I want it to be with Elliot, but Bill Lawrence hates the 'Will they, won’t they?' Sam-and-Diane thing that makes every other show have great ratings...But I’m a romantic, so I would love that."

Sex, or the Lack Thereof: The Todd is still gay, reports Robert Maschio about his character, who turns out to be something like the Pepé Le Pew of prime time. "I say the Todd is not homosexual, he's not bisexual, he's trisexual—because he's willing to try anything. Or ATM, anything that moves. So, he's just this is a character that constantly talks about sex, but in six years of the show, you've never seen me with a woman." And things aren't much better down in the basement. Johnny Kastl (totally hot in real life!) says of pathologist Doug, "No babies for Doug. He's asexual." Nor does there seem to be much hope for Ted. Sam Lloyd says, "I don't think romance in the cards for that guy. He needs a serious makeover."

—Additional (stellar!) reporting by Jennifer Godwin

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