After Lately Recap: The Juice Cleanse

Chelsea forces her staff to go on a juice cleanse and Kevin Nealon smashes into Fortune's car.

By Matt Faaborg Mar 26, 2013 6:01 AMTags
After Lately RecapE!

We thought the British had a reputation for being polite, but Kate Beckinsale is maybe the RUDEST person on the show so far… at least to Chelsea (who, let's be honest, probably deserves it).

Kate tells Chelsea that her body is "not great" and that her tendency to indulge in, *ahem*, man meat is not helping her health at all. She convinces Chelsea to go on a juice cleanse. To compensate for the misery she's about to endure, Chelsea, like any good boss, forces her entire writing staff to go on the cleanse with her.

Except for Fortune, whose body is beyond repair.

Fortune is forced to seek out the secret snack stash she hides in her car after all of the food in the kitchen is removed, but finds out her car has been hit… by Kevin Nealon.

The malnutrition caused by the juice cleanse is starting to make the staff lose their minds, and they begin contemplating whose butt they would eat first if they had to resort to cannibalism. (Spoiler: They decide on Jen's butt)

Just as tempers reach an all-time high, Chuy walks in with a hamburger and tells the staff he's been cheating on the juice cleanse. Chelsea then steals the burger and wolfs it down, betraying Kate Beckinsale, and dismantling all of the progress she made with the cleanse.

FUNNIEST QUOTES

Kate: "It's not just the yoga – it's also what you're eating and what you're doing. You've got quite a toxic lifestyle."
Chelsea: "What are you doing that's different?"
Kate: "I'm having juice. I'm having absolutely no food at all, let alone drugs and different types of penis every day."

Kevin Nealon to Fortune: "You have the face of a large-faced baby."

Chris to Heather: "Sometimes I wish I was a girl so I could fight you. I'd fight you. I'd punch you right through your face. My fist would go through your face if I was a girl."

Tune in Mondays at 10:30/9:30c for new episodes of After Lately!